“In today’s world, we’re
so ingrained to expect
instant gratification
and that our problems
can be solved with
minimal effort.”
I hate complaining. This advice is for the complainers.
I’m not upset with you if you play video games all day
or watch Netflix all night. I’m mad at you if you’re
doing that and you’re baffled by why you’re not making
more money and living your dream. If you’re happy and
content, you’ve won. But if you’re complaining, it means
you haven’t won yet and you should stop complaining
and do something about it instead.
Someone I look up to most in the world (tied with you,
Dad) is my mother. Hands down, one of the most intriguing
thing about my mother is her inability to complain. It’s
probably one of my favorite traits that she’s passed
down to me. I find it incredibly attractive and it’s a quality
I adore in my wife as well. It’s even something I try to
instill in my children because I think complaining is ugly.
Personally, I don’t complain. (Except about the New
York Jets—I complain about them a lot.) If you look
at my tweets historically, maybe there’s two or three
complaints. You’ll never catch me complaining about not
seeing my kids enough or about not having enough leisure
time because if I had an issue with those things, I would
either do something about it or at least recognize that I
have the ability to do something about it.
There’s no shifting into the complain zone when I
encounter an issue I’m not happy with. I’m very “put your
head down” when it comes to problem solving. It’s about
assessing the problem, figuring it out, and then going
directly back on the offense. Complaining is defense.
To me, the only thing that is acceptable to complain
about are the things that you can’t control like the
unfortunate health of yourself or your loved ones or
some other unforeseen tragedies.
I want to clarify, just to set the record straight: If
23
you’re complaining, about anything, then you need to
audit yourself. You can’t just go watch House of Cards.
You can’t play ball all day. You can’t go to ballet shows.
You can’t sit there and ponder the what-ifs like: “What
if I had rich parents” or “what if I grew up in a better
neighborhood” or “what if I made that investment” or
“what if I went to that school.” You gotta work to fix it.
There are so many people reading this right now who
are complaining. People love to complain because it’s
easy. Executing to fix those problems, on the other hand,
is hard.
Look, I understand that many of you have student
loans and mortgages and a rough time working two
jobs while trying to spend time with your family. But,
are you happy? If you are, then you’ve won because you
don’t actually have anything to complain about. The real
problem is that there are so many millions of people
who are unhappy and are just sitting around complaining
and then just playing Madden for hours or having their
18th dinner with their other “complaining friend” and
just complaining back and forth together. They’re
not actually trying to solve the very things they’re
complaining about.
Complaining is easy. Executing is hard.
In today’s world, we’re so ingrained to expect instant
gratification and that our problems can be solved with
minimal effort. Patience is real and so is hard work.
Sometimes, that hard work might not even be as terrible
as you think. Need more money? We live in a 24-7 world
where you can make money in your underwear. Think
about it.
If there’s one thing I want you to learn from reading
this, it’s that complaining has zero value. Looking at the
negative, seeing the glass as half empty and complaining
are some of the biggest wastes of time a human being
can engage in. Instead, tackle the problem head on.
Assess it, see what you can do about it, and then do just
that. “Woe is me” is truly
one of the biggest things
that can stand in the way of
success both professionally
and personally.
www.GaryVaynerchuk.com