I wasn't looking forward to the trip. As I walked toward the exit, I remembered the earlier request and scrounged around for the note with the room number. I moved back to the elevators and up to that room. Walking into the room, I saw a young, emaciated, man, slumped in a chair with IV tubes in both arms, and neck, with dozens of wires connecting multiple monitors trailing under his hospital gown. He was staring down at the floor. He was alone. I introduced my self and told him I had been asked to stop by to see him. I told him I had just celebrated my one year VAD implant anniversary. He struggled to rise and I quickly moved to his side saying, "Please, sit - you don't need... He stood anyway. Shook my hand, introduced himself, "Please, call me Mark" and thanked me for stopping by.
As we both sat down, Mark started our conversation sharing the details of his CHF progress/digress. We talked about similarities, cardiomyopathy, low ejection fractions, and the other stuff that only other heart failure patients and families would understand. He said, "but you look so healthy". I told him that had not been the case a year ago. Then his cell phone rang. Mark said, " Its my Dad, he'll call back". I insisted he take the call, I had the time. He answered the call and a moment later, looked at me and said to his Dad, "Dad, hope just walked into my room". After the call we chatted for a few more moments. We were talking about device choices when his phone rang again, I excused myself, waved "bye" Mark thanked me again for my time and I left.
We talked about similarities, cardiomyopathy, low ejection fractions, and the other stuff that only other heart failure patients and families would understand.
In the elevator, heading to my car and for most of the ride home I heard Mark telling his Dad that HOPE had just walked into his room. As I write this I understand how truly blessed I have been. My CHF diagnosis has been terrifying, frustrating, humbling, painful, life changing and amazing.
For those of you reading this I HOPE you find the amazing. I hoped I would.
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