all our time together , rotating through Pediatrics , OB / GYN , Surgery , etc . It was great having Medicine show me what each specialty had to offer , but since we spent every minute with one another , it was tough not to lose myself in the relationship . I started to see a different side of Medicine , one that I had not seen before . Medicine started really challenging me and would not accept anything less than 100 percent . From oral presentations and exams , to tons of scut work , Medicine kept pushing me and asking for more . At times , I wasn ’ t sure that I had any more to give .
In fourth year , Medicine lightened up a bit . It seemed that we finally enjoyed the company of one another ; we had regained our senses of humor . We picked a specialty , talked about where we wanted to live after graduation . We visited and interviewed in several places . We looked at our future with a lot of hope and optimism . After all , together , we were going to save lives and make a difference !
That bliss was also short . Upon graduation , we moved away from my family and intern year started . Though we were inseparable , I felt so lonely during that first year . Medicine monopolized me . Once again , Medicine pushed me harder and harder , and even when I thought I had given enough , Medicine asked for more . Medicine did not care if I was post-call or on an off day – Medicine was always there , in my face , reminding me that patients ’ lives were on the line . I was the most vulnerable I had ever been in my life during that intern year . I started to doubt my commitment to Medicine .
Life did get better though . By the end of intern year , I had gotten to know my fellow residents and realized that they , too , had tumultuous relationships with Medicine . We commiserated about Medicine ’ s mood swings , and started to have more fun at Medicine ’ s expense . We also reflected back on intern year and realized that Medicine did make us better physicians , despite all the drama .
I also met Matthew around this time , which threw both me and Medicine for a loop . After having Medicine monopolize me for so long , how was Matthew going to fit in the picture ? All of a sudden , I had to attempt to learn “ balance ,” something Medicine was not very good at teaching .
Twelve years later , both my marriages are going strong . I have found a good balance between Medicine and the rest of my life that now involves Matthew and our toddler son , though maintaining that balance is challenging . Medicine continues to ask for all of me , and there are days when I can give Medicine my all and days that I can ’ t .
Every relationship changes us , and my relationship with Medicine is no different . I know I am not the same starry-eyed girl from high school looking at Medicine as the exciting , sexy and perfect Prince Charming . I ’ ve developed a certain resiliency , because Medicine continually pushes me to my max and never settles for anything than my best . Medicine has taught me to think critically through problems , not just to graze the surface . Even now , Medicine can still expose me to my core , forcing me to connect with my patients in many different ways .
And as in every relationship , I ’ ve learned from the good times and the bad times . I now truly appreciate the blessings in my life and openly learn from my mistakes . I am no longer content with doing the same thing over and over again , and find I like challenging myself to learn something new , whether it ’ s staying current on best practices or picking up a new hobby .
Much as Medicine has changed through the years , I too , have changed with it . My practice of medicine has evolved from seeing patients at the bedside as a traditional Internist to a more administrative role in trying to improve quality on a global level . Medicine gave me the foundation to come out of my comfort zone and be willing to make that change in my career .
In some ways , I am still that starry-eyed girl , full of optimism and positive intent , but my years with Medicine have made me more cynical about health care and the world where we live . Despite my cynicism , I am a better physician , wife , parent , and person because of Medicine . And although the world continues to change , Medicine still remains my constant , and will remain my life-long partner .
So , for better , for worse , for richer , for poorer , in sickness and in health , “ May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I long experience the joy of healing those who seek my help ”, 1 till death do us part .
1 “ The Hippocratic Oath : Modern Version ”. Louis Lasagna . 1964 .
Valerie Briones-Pryor practice as a Hospitalist with KentuckyOne Hospital Medicine Associates as well as the Medical Director of the Hospital Medicine Service Line for KentuckyOne Health .
As residency came to a close , Medicine started doing a better job of sharing me with Matthew . And to Matthew ’ s credit , he was very patient in learning my relationship with Medicine . Matthew and I got married shortly after residency ended , and whether Matthew knew it or not , he married Medicine as well .
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