Looking after someone 2017, Wales | Page 8

8 Keeping relationships fulfilling “I was suddenly juggling hospital visits, a full-time job and trying not to scream. I remember feeling I had lost all control over my life: that stroke had happened not just to Peter, but to both of us.” 9 Caring for our loved ones can express the best of who we are, and can take a relationship to a profound new level. It can also push us to the brink through financial, emotional and practical strain. Illness can cast aside the best-laid plans and make relationships feel utterly different. What matters most is that there’s a way for us to talk honestly and find help when we need it. Adapting to changing circumstances Whether we’re looking after someone who’s recovering or whose condition is deteriorating over time, caring inevitably involves adapting to circumstances. Sometimes it’s easy to focus on the practical details – the administration of care workers or move to the care home. Being able to stay attentive to our relationship with the person we’re caring for in the midst of all that change is far from easy. Looking after someone “There were times when it seemed that dad was at death’s door. But a couple of days later he was sitting up in bed, bright as a button. That really made the emotions difficult, constantly living on the edge.” carerswales.org