M AY / J U N E 2 0 1 6
21
This contrast in
a relationship
can actually be
a benefit.
Relationships:
“Neatniks” vs. “Slobs”
Should one try tidiness or should the
other lighten up?
by TaNiqua Ward, M.S.,
Staff Writer
Everyone has different tolerance
levels for messiness. One person
thinks leaving one dirty dish in
the sink constitutes a mess, but
another person can go to sleep at
night with a sink full of unwashed
dishes. You may like to keep your
bedroom clean but your partner
doesn’t mind some clutter. Some
people have a natural instinct for
a clean environment while others
are more careless about their
surroundings. There is a constant
battle whether someone who is
messy should make an effort to
be tidy or if someone who is tidy
should lighten up and start to be
more carefree.
Unfortunately, there is no
direct answer about who should
change their habits. “Neatniks”
have their own way of life just as
“slobs” do. According to The Wall
Street Journal, both suffer from
a need for control. Neatniks say
they need order and everything
should be in its place. Slobs, on
the other hand, don’t like someone else having control over them.
Yet they may feel guilty they aren’t
neat and resentful that someone
is demanding that they should be.
This contrast in a relationship can
actually be a benefit because the
conflicting parties can learn to accept each another and their faults.
There are ways to compromise
to make life easier and more
comfortable for both neatniks and
slobs – to find a balance between
the two. You can:
• Communicate. Make sure you
set guidelines and boundaries
together. Be sure to discuss with
one another any problems that
may arise. Also, be willing to negotiate and find a compromise
in all situations.
• Designate Set Areas. Allow
certain areas in the house to be
a little bit messier, such as the
bedroom. Designate the kitchen
and the living room as clean
areas in case you have company.
• Cleaning Days. Choose at least
one day a week to clean (and do
it together). Sundays are a great
day to clean the entire house
and have everything in order for
the new week.
• Focus on Your Relationship.
The most important thing
should always be the relationship. Make time to focus on one
another and the reasons why
you are together.
In their book The Odd Couple
Syndrome: Resolving the Neat/
Sloppy Dilemma, Selwyn Mills
and Max Weisser cited a study
that found 80 percent of people
who are left brained consider
themselves neat, while 75 percent
of right-brain individuals consider themselves slobs. The left
and right sides of the brain are
attracted to each other based on
strengths and weaknesses. The
left side of the brain is said to be
responsible for functions such as
rational thinking while the right
side is said to be the center of
creativity. The common saying
that “opposites attract” is very
true. Neatniks and slobs do not
just lack luck in choosing a partner. The combination of neatniks
and slobs pertains to the laws of
attraction.
’
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