LifeGrid Magazine May 2018 | Page 19

Moving Beyond Your #MeToo Experience by Nancy Mueller When a current or past experience continues to bring up negative memories, feelings and emotions, it's often a catalyst for causing us to doubt who we are as women as well as who we deserve to be and what we deserve to have. to her that matters, it’s what she does with what hap- pens to her that will determine her future. After an assault, your life will never be the same again; but you have the power to choose how you’ll live your life. When doubt hijacks our self-worth, it can cause a ripple effect that escalates to a point where we feel powerless over how we live our life; and spills over into our careers, relationships, health and even who we see in the mirror. STEPPING OUT OF VICTIM AND VENGEANCE MODE: When violence has been thrust upon us, violence often seems the logical recourse. As we speak our truth, as we speak out, we often want our perpetrator to suffer as we’ve suffered, causing us to waste hours, months and even years creating negative feelings and emotions that only add to our grief. There is a way to reclaim what you believe was taken from you, there is a way to take back your power once you realize the only thing that can be taken from is what you choose to give away. When you look in the mirror, choose to see the warrior within you. She’s staring back at you. She’s waiting for you. She’s waiting to hear you say, “I choose who I will give my power to, I choose me.” Everything we choose to believe is a story we’ve created in our mind. Your story can be told with you as the warrior or you as the victim. IT'S TIME TO TAKE BACK YOUR POWER! A woman who has experienced any form of verbal, emotional or physical assault can be left with a range of emotions, including (but not limited to) grief, despondency, denial, anger, "why me", vengeance, retribution, downplaying the experience, low self-worth and it can take years to understand how it affects the way you’re showing up in your life. Women may even go so far as to downplay the event to convince themselves the experience wasn't "that bad" when they compare their story to the stories of others. When we’ve had enough, when we decide the cost of keeping quiet is too high, many women make the decision to speak their truth as a first step in reclaim- ing her power. She speaks her truth because she knows that having been victimized does not make her a victim. She knows that it’s not what happens The story you choose to believe, will determine how you show up in your life. Remember: Life Is All About Choices