A hundred years ago a man ’ s experience of desolation gave birth to a hymn which has been for me and for many the balm of heaven . George Matheson went blind shortly after becoming engaged . His fiancée broke the engagement .
Perhaps there is no more bitter loneliness than that of rejection . Not only must one learn to do without someone he had come to feel he could not live without , but he must endure dagger-thrusts to the heart , such as : You deserved to be rejected . You are not worthy to be loved . You will never be loved . Who would want you ? You are condemned to loneliness forever , and nobody cares .
Fear and anger arise . If I turn to God He might reject me . How can I turn to Him anyway ? He could have prevented this from happening . What else is He likely to do to me ?
The devastating conclusion is reached : I am alone .
Matheson ’ s grief , instead of turning to bitter resentment against the lady who had caused it , was transformed . Totally transformed . These profound and simple words show how that happened :
O Love that wilt not let me go , I rest my weary soul in Thee ; I give Thee back the life I owe , That in Thine ocean depths its flow May richer , fuller be .
O Joy that seekest me through pain , I cannot close my heart to Thee ;
I trace the rainbow through the rain , And feel the promise is not vain That morn shall tearless be .
O Cross that liftest up my head , I dare not ask to fly from Thee ; I lay in dust life ’ s glory dead , And from the ground there blossoms red Life that shall endless be .
What , exactly , did Matheson do ? He gave back his life , opened his heart , laid down life ’ s glory . That spells surrender , which can only come of trust .
His blindness and rejection proved to be for George Matheson the very means of illuminating the Love of God . He may have asked the age-old question , Why ? but God ’ s answer is always Trust Me . Matheson turned his thoughts away from the woman he had lost , away from the powerful temptations to self-pity , resentment , bitterness toward God , skepticism of His Word , and selfish isolation which might so quickly have overcome him , and lifted up his “ weary soul ” to a far greater Love-one that would never let him go .
In the words “ I give Thee back the life I owe ” Matheson understood that there was something he could do with his suffering . It was the great lesson of the Cross : surrender . If Jesus had been unwilling to surrender to humanity ’ s worst crime , humanity ’ s salvation would have been impossible . But at Calvary the Lord of the Earth surrendered Himself into the hands of evil men . Yet , paradoxically , no one took His life from Him . He laid it down of His own will , offered Himself to the Father ,
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