“ Being fearful won ’ t help you . It will actually paralyze you .“
I was once speaking in a new city , and after I had finished with the service , I came back to my hotel room where thoughts began to bombard my mind . For some reason , I had an onslaught of dark thoughts about death .
I thought of a great minister I had just seen .
He ’ s buried three of his children .
And then another God-fearing pastor came to mind .
His son was electrocuted and killed .
Then followed thoughts of a third godly leader I knew .
His son died in a car accident .
Even more tragedies involving ministers ’ children continued to fill my mind .
As I sat on the edge of the bed and removed one of my dress shoes , my body began to tremble . I thought of my own sons .
What if something like that happens to them ? If it can happen to these great ministers , it can surely happen to me .
I was overwhelmed and paralyzed by this fear . And then the Holy Spirit spoke to me .
John , if there ’ s an area you have fear in , you ’ re still holding it , you still own it . You haven ’ t put it at the foot of the cross .
It was true . I hadn ’ t fully committed our sons to God , and therefore was subjected to destructive fears attacking my mind and consequently paralyzing me . Fears that weren ’ t even a real- ity . I realized in that moment that I am not big enough to protect my boys — only God is .
“ Being fearful won ’ t help you . It will actually paralyze you .“
I jumped up off the bed , one shoe still in hand , and screamed as loud as I could , “ Addison , he ’ s not mine ! Austin , he ’ s not mine !
Nor Alec ; he ’ s not mine !” ( Arden was not born yet , but God knew I was speaking of any children we might have in the future .)
“ God , they ’ re all yours !” I shouted . “ I ’ m just a steward over them . You may do whatever You want with them . I won ’ t be possessive of them — even if You take them halfway around the world . Even if You take them to heaven . I will trust in You and not live in fear .”
Then I paused before yelling again , “ Devil — you ’ re never killing them ! You cannot touch them . They belong to Jesus !”
I ’ ve never feared for my sons ’ lives since . Never . Not once .
Take those destructive fears you have and place them at the foot of the cross . This
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