Because it is so intense due to the high expectations, you need to put thought and planning into how you are going to work as a team to produce your Grande Affaire. This project you have embarked on will show you how you are going to work together and support one another in your Happily Ever After lives. It is the true building block of a married relationship.
HAVE FUN TOGETHER!
This is a rollercoaster ride - enjoy it! Don't get so caught up in the wedding planning that you forget about how much fun you have together. Take your planning tasks and make them events for yourselves. sit and talk like you did in the beginning, over a bottle of wine until long past midnight. Take your wedding playlist and dance together (especially the First Dance). Have practise meals of your menu items - you don't need an excuse to bring out the silver cutlery and have a romantic dinner.
COMPROMISE TO WIN
Don't be shocked when you hear how many heated battles have started about where you want the serviettes placed on the table, or something else trivial. Recognise this to be a sign of bottled up stress. Take a time out from the planning. Have a sit-down and discuss your expectations. Find out what each one will not compromise on, and what each one will, and map out your route from there. Understanding each other's perspective is another important building block in a happy marriage.
DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR LIVES BEFORE THIS STEP?
If you can’t remember the last time you talked about something unrelated to your big day, imagine how your family, friends and colleagues must feel! Don't become another Boring Bride-to-Be! It is important to keep balance in everything. Everyone else had families, lives and careers that they want to talk about - it isn't all about you, all the time.
At home, make a rule of no wedding talk in a specific room, on a specific night, at from a specific time of night. Go to the movies, and don't say the "W" word at all. Go out with friends and stay off of the wedding topic. Give yourself, yourselves and them space to breathe and enjoy life with everything else happening in it.
As you near the big day, plan a date night with your hubby-to-be - you won't be spending much quality time together at this stage - take an evening to reconnect.
REMEMBER WHY
When the wedding itself becomes the main focus of everything, stop everything. Is the exact timing of your entrance into the reception hall more important than why you are getting married? Don't work so hard on the details that you set yourself up for an anti-climax on the Day. You don't want to be going on honeymoon in a state of tension because the huge ice-sculpture melted into the dessert platter, or that your fears of inviting your "thirsty" uncle came true ... all these things work in your sub-conscience before the Big Day, and you can find yourself stressed to the point of snapping before you even wake up on your last "single" morning.
Spend some time together before the time, remembering how he, or you, proposed; talk about your dreams as a married couple; remind each other what you love about each other ...
Getting married is about the marriage, not the wedding ... remember that.
THERE IS LIFE AFTER THE RECEPTION
More often than not, married life after the honeymoon is over, is an anti-climax. Bear in mind that once you've packed away your honeymoon clothes, the Something Wonderful starts. Make time during the run-up to your wedding, to plan activities for afterwards. Make plans to visit your parents, go out with friends, take a weekend off together to spend alone.
You are each other's Forever Afters - make work of upholding that intense love you felt at the first kiss in the church, or the first dance. Make the depth of your wedding love, last throughout your marriage.
Stay in love on your way to the altar
Don’t let guest lists and decor debates take over your lives.
You are planning a wedding because you are in love, but the stress of it all can damage your relationship.
It's normal! Relax!