Reading between the lines
Dying Hair What Not to Ask ...
1. “Why don’t you go back to your natural color? It looked so good.”
I think this is hilarious, considering that I barely remember what my natural hair color looked like. I’m flattered that you think so, but I assure you that whatever you think was my natural hair color actually wasn’t.
2. “You should really think about the damage you’re doing to your hair.”
…says the salesperson with a bottle of $50 deep conditioner in hand.
3. “Honey, you need to fix those roots ASAP.”
If you’ve ever changed your hair color in a significant way, you know to secretly pray that your hair magically stops growing so you can avoid going for a root touchup as long as possible. This is not how life works, and maintaining your hair color is important if you want to keep up your unnatural hair life. That being said, life is busy, and there’s no reason to berate someone for being a bit behind schedule on the upkeep of their own hair.
4. “Is your hair natural?” [chuckle, chuckle]
I chalked my hair green for Halloween and got this joke more than once. Nothing super offensive about it, it’s just, you know…not a very good joke.
5. “Can I bleach your hair for you?”
Unless the person talking to me is a professional hair colorist, no thank you. Bleach is hardcore and I’d like to protect my scalp from chemical burns.
6. “You know, with that new color, you should definitely get an edgier hair cut. I can do it for you!”
I think I’d prefer the chemical burn to a bad haircut. (Okay, not true but still… back away from the scissors, please.)
7. “You really have more of a blonde personality type.”
It’s so funny that people still associate personality traits with hair color. Blondes, redheads, and brunettes all have the pleasure of being associated with a specific set of arbitrary traits. If I have more fun as a blonde, it’s because it’s fun to embrace a color change. Contrary to popular opinion, toner does not seep into your brain and alter your chemistry.
8. “Are you trying to look like Marilyn Monroe?”
I’ve been inspired by certain celeb’s hair color (Sienna Miller’s rose gold is the shade I’m currently lusting after) but I know that simply by dying my hair the same shade as Emilia Clarke’s gorgeous chocolate brown or Nicole Richie‘s newly dyed purple that I’ll look anything like them. (No, the answer to looking like a celebrity is plastic surgery. Lots of plastic surgery.) Miley Cyrus didn’t patent platinum and Dita Von Teese isn’t the only one who should be rocking dark lustrous locks.
9. “Doesn’t maintaining your hair get exhausting?”
If maintaining your hair color ever gets “exhausting,” please stop doing it. For me, hitting the salon every few weeks is a nice time to zone out, read a few magazines, and update my Pinterest. What it does get is expensive, which is why I totally get why people try to squeeze out a few extra weeks between touch-ups. (For those people, I recommend hats. Lots of hats.)
10. “You looked the most natural as a blonde. You should go back to it.”
Some people are under the assumption that people dye their hair in order to find that one perfect shade that they will want to keep forever because that’s how freaking good it looks.
-Kaitlin Riley