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RELATIONSHIPS
By Yolanda Collins
What you want or what you need?
Life is lived by the choices we make. There are
always multiple options to the outcome in most of the
situations we face. And the end result is always
based on the choices we make. If your are weighing
your options based on what you want, I can tell you
right now, that you are probably about to make the
wrong choice. Start putting what you need ahead of
what you want. I am going to give an example that I
feel may help someone that is going through this
struggle.You have been single and dating, and you
have finally narrowed it down to 2 people.
The first option, has a great career, is very trust
worthy, and focused on what they want in life. They
are a little more serious than you are about some
things, but you have great times together and you
know you could be happy with this person. But, it
would require you to make some changes that would
ultimately be for the better. The second option - has
no job, hangs out everyday doing who knows what,
and is not working toward achieving any real goals.
You also have great times together and you know
that you could be happy with this person as well. But,
they do not care if you ever change, even if it’s for the
better. And you are going to require this person to do
some work on their self in order to build the future that
you want.
Here is the killing part: You love the first option, and
you know that this person is who you need to be with
to build a future. But, you are in love with the second
option, and this is who you want to be with right now.
That is ALWAYS the case. And what do we ALWAYS
do? We go with what we want; the “right now” option
and we end up regretting the decision. Then we think
about what life would have been life if we had just
chose the person that we knew we needed to be with
in the first place. One could say “oh well, we have to
live and learn.” But the truth is, most people have been
in this exact scenario more than once, which means
you have not learned anything. Now that was just one
example. You must know that relationships are only
one of the areas, where making decisions based on
what we want instead of what we need, can cause us
to have regrets. It happens in financial
decisions,($10,000 Dodge Charger instead of a
$5,000 Toyota Camry), business decisions (Hiring
employees based on looks instead of abilities) and
even in decisions about our diet. (“Do I really need this
donut or do I just want it?”) Just remember, when life
gives you situations in which you are faced with
multiple options, start making your choices more
carefully. And when doing so, remember that what you
want is not always what you need
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