June 2018 Issue #18 June 2018 PRIDE issue #18 4GUYS | Page 68

9. Go easy on any substances
Some people choose to use substances as part of the top bottom experience. The
choice is obviously up to you and your partner however, mindfulness based con-
nections are usually devoid of such items because they can dull the senses – par-
ticularly when overused.
If substances will be part of the experience, use them minimally. Here, we’re talking
about everything from poppers, pot and other things that traditionally are part of the
alphabet.
Mindfulness is all about the natural – the here and now. Ask yourself if substance
really need to be part of what’s happening.
10. Spoon afterwards
To a fault, most bottoms and tops will tell you that spending time together after re-
leasing is important. There’s nothing worse than finishing and then having your
partner leap from the bed in a mad dash for the bathroom. It can send the unin-
tended message of shame and guilt.
Instead, try to spend a little time spooning with your man. Wrap your arms around
his torso and hold him for a bit.
Remember, the both of you have just expended a great deal of energy. Why not al-
low yourself to enjoy the moment in a way that lets you tune into him. Listen to his
heartbeat and feel his blood pumping. This will send the message that you value
his efforts and that you care.
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