Review : Identify any what-ifs that constitute borrowing trouble .
If it isn ’ t certain ( or quickly made certain ) and it ’ s negative , it ’ s borrowing trouble . When I do this exercise , pretty much all of my whatifs fit this category – it ’ s okay if yours do , too .
Reframe : Take the first borrowing trouble what-if on your list and borrow joy instead .
Re-write that what-if from one of concern , fear , guilt or anxiety to one that is positive . Really sit with that positive what-if . Breathe it in . Consider what it will feel like if the positive what-if actually happens . Think about it so much you start to feel it . Allow it to become as much part of you as the original negative what-if . Allow yourself some positive daydreams . You will know you ’ ve succeeded when you start to smile at your own thoughts .
The more you practice this exercise , the more easily you can catch yourself before starting down the what-if spiral . Next time you start to think what if I fail ? make sure you remember to also ask yourself what if I succeed ? Give at least equal airtime – energetically , conversationally , mentally – to both . In a perfect world , you will turn your full focus to thinking about what happens when it all works out just the way it was meant to .
Excerpted and adapted from the book The Happiness Recipe : A Powerful Guide to Living What Matters . Copyright © 2021 by Rebecca Morrison
REBECCA MORRISON - Rebecca Morrison – the author
The Happiness Recipe - is a mom , wife and lawyer turned Happiness & Leadership Coach . After a two-decade career in Big-Law and Finance filled with both happiness and success , Becky helps successful but unsatisfied high achievers find their happiness recipe so they can live happier , lead happier and build happy businesses . You can connect with her at
www . untanglehappiness . com .
“ Stop spending emotional energy on a negative outcome that you aren ’ t even sure is going to happen .”
Becky Morrison