Jottings from previous page
... Tom Youngs who is a hooker with Leicester Tigers rugby union club and who was described as a “ prostitute ” by US news website Insider Voice . Who described the UK and the USA as two countries separated by a common language ?
... Margaret and Donald Lincoln of France who thanked their daughter Angela for “ a really lovely dinner of gorgeous paté ” and asked her to buy it for them again . Angela , who does shopping for her parents , was confused until they showed her the tin of Carrefour ’ s “ Mousse gourmande ” – which has a picture of a cat on the label ...
Quotes
“ Love your calves .” – Scotland ’ s Stephen O ’ Donnell to England ’ s Jack Grealish during their Euro 2020 match on June 19 in an effort to unsettle his
Aston Villa team mate .
“ I think he left the Conservative party a long time ago .” – UK Justice Secretary Lord Buckland on hearing that former Commons Speaker John Bercow had joined the Labour Party .
“ It ' s ok Europe we hate the United Kingdom too . Love , Scotland .” – Scottish National Party councillor Rhiannon Spear commenting on the UK ’ s score of “ nul points ” in the Eurovision Song Contest . Spear , who ( remarkably ) is also chair of Glasgow City Council ’ s education committee , later apologised for “ any offence caused .”
“ You were engaged to impart wisdom and learning ... You feel unable to comply . Our accountants will now feel unable to sign your pay cheques ...” – Frederick Forsyth in the Daily Mail suggesting how Oxford University authorities should deal with their striking dons and tutors .
“ Wake up , grow up and shut up .” – Alan Jones of Sky News in Australia addressing school kids who went on strike to protest about climate change last year .
“ She reminded me of my mother in terms of the look of her and , you know , just the generosity .” – US President Joe Biden going all soppy after his meeting with Queen Elizabeth .
“ There is no happiness in life . There is only a mirage on the horizon , so cherish that .” – Vladamir Putin going all philosophical in a press conference following his meeting with Joe Biden .
“ Typical f ****** woke snowflake .” – Noel Gallagher of Oasis on Prince Harry . ( He added other comments but we ran out of asterisks .)
Grateful acknowledgement to the following papers from which some of this material is extracted : Daily Mail , Daily Mirror , Daily Express , Independent on Sunday , Mail on Sunday , The Sun , The Sunday Times , The Times and The Telegraph .
Seen something funny , bizarre or just plain weird ? Contributions for Jottings are welcome by email to : sarah @ soltalk . com .
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