7. Distance yourself immediately.
The temptation to do the slow fade may be great, but in the
long run, it’s going to be much easier to move on if you
immediately cut off all contact with your ex. That means no
“harmless lunches,” no phone calls, no emails, and no texts.
Resist the urge to stalk him on Facebook and Twitter, too. In
fact, delete or hide him from your friends’ list. Having access to
his cyber life is a crutch. You’re better off learning to run
without it right from the get-go. In time, when you feel in your
heart you’re healed, you can decide if you want to have him in
your life as a friend. When that happens, an email here and a
lunch date there may be appropriate, but always pay attention
to your internal warning signs. If you feel yourself being pulled
back into the drama, let him go forever.
8. Allow yourself to be lonely.
I can’t tell you how many letters I receive from “Dear Wendy”
readers that say they don’t want to end their relationships
because they don’t want to be lonely. Look, you’re going to be
lonely. It’s going to suck. And then … it’s not going to suck so
much anymore. And if you give yourself a chance to heal and