Isn’t there something else that our children
should perceive as our essential parental role?
earlier than we may think. In Pirkei Avos,
the Sages praise the mother of Rabbi Yehoshua ben Chananya for bringing his cot
into the Beis Medrash so he might absorb
subliminally the Torah learned there.
Articulate your values
As our children grow, our mentoring
role grows along with them. This means
we must articulate our values in memorable expressions that will ring in our
children’s ears even in their adult years.
Mama Used to Say (Feldheim Publishers) is the name of a wonderful collection of such aphorisms. In the year after her mother’s passing, Rachel Rosmarin kept on hearing her mother’s
Yiddish pearls of wisdom whispering in
her inner ear, as she went about her
day-by-day. As she started writing
down these treasures, she realised they
could fill a book of over 300 pages!
I know a woman who received a special
birthday present from her adult children.
They had gotten together and written
down the expressions that she had repeated in exasperation all the years of
their childhood. She was flabbergasted to
find out they had actually been listening.
Yes, mothers, there is hope!
Of course, ultimately, it is what we do
that matters more than what we say.
Rabbi Paysach Krohn tells the story of a
man who takes his son to the circus and
lies about the child’s age at the ticket
counter. “Gevalt!” Rabbi Krohn yells as
he tells the story “You just spent thousands of dollars to send your child to a
Jewish day school in order that he
should become an ethical human being
and a mensch. And you throw it all away
to save five bucks!”
Nature abhors a vacuum
If we abdicate our teaching role, the results will not be neutral. Nature abhors a
vacuum; other influencers will rush in to
take our place. Way back in the last century, parents only had to worry about monitoring playmates and making sure their
children did not go to the wrong movies.
In our plugged-in generation, it is almost impossible to control what ‘teachers’ our children are exposed to through
the net and social media. I will speak
about this in the next issue.
Facing these unprecedented challenges, it is even more imperative that our
children look to us for mentoring… as
well as for schlepping! JL
Rabbi Ze’ev Kraines, M Ed, is Rav of Ohr Somayach Sandton. He is
active in adult, teen, and children’s education, having served locally as
mashgiach of Ohr Somayach’s Yeshiva, director of Ma’ayan Bina Sem
and of Pirchei SA, and principal of Shaarei Torah School and Ohr
Somayach Sandton Nursery. He and his wife Nechama lead parenting
workshops in Johannesburg.
COME VISIT THE WORLD’S MOST LIVEABLE CITY
MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA
And stay at the ONLY Kosher Hotel in Australia^
Book Now from R1,400 a night*
Mention this Promo Code “Jewish Life” for a 10% Discount AND a FREE Breakfast
for everyone staying in your room / apartment
Valid for stays up until 30th July 2015
Available Apartments:
• Standard Queen Room
• Spa Queen Room
• Standard King Room
• One-Bedroom Apartment
• Two-bedroom Townhouse with Spa
• Three-bedroom Townhouse with Spa
• Deluxe Spa Room
Owned and operated by
a South African family
”We Understand You”
In the Heart of the Bagel Belt and within walking distance to over a
dozen Shuls in the Caulfield / St Kilda Area
Book online (and use the Promo Code): www.kimberleygardenshotel.com.au
Book by phone (and mention the Promo Code): +613 9526 3888
^Onsite Kosher Restaurant. Applicable Apartments with Kitchens can be Koshered on Request.
*Standard room, free breakfast for all occupants up to a maximum of 5 days.
*Call us for rates for any other room types.