CHAPTER III 27
Bessie would rather have stayed , but she was obliged to go , because punctuality at meals was rigidly enforced at Gateshead Hall .
" The fall did not make you ill ; what did , then ?" pursued Mr . Lloyd when Bessie was gone .
" I was shut up in a room where there is a ghost till after dark ." I saw Mr . Lloyd smile and frown at the same time . " Ghost ! What , you are a baby after all ! You are afraid of ghosts ?"
" Of Mr . Reed ' s ghost I am : he died in that room , and was laid out there . Neither Bessie nor any one else will go into it at night , if they can help it ; and it was cruel to shut me up alone without a candle , -- so cruel that I think I shall never forget it ."
" Nonsense ! And is it that makes you so miserable ? Are you afraid now in daylight ?"
" No : but night will come again before long : and besides , -- I am unhappy , -- very unhappy , for other things ."
" What other things ? Can you tell me some of them ?"
How much I wished to reply fully to this question ! How difficult it was to frame any answer ! Children can feel , but they cannot analyse their feelings ; and if the analysis is partially effected in thought , they know not how to express the result of the process in words . Fearful , however , of losing this first and only opportunity of relieving my grief by imparting it , I , after a disturbed pause , contrived to frame a meagre , though , as far as it went , true response .
" For one thing , I have no father or mother , brothers or sisters ." " You have a kind aunt and cousins ."