CHAPTER XVII 222
" Ask Blanche ; she is nearer you than I ."
" Oh , don ' t refer him to me , mama ! I have just one word to say of the whole tribe ; they are a nuisance . Not that I ever suffered much from them ; I took care to turn the tables . What tricks Theodore and I used to play on our Miss Wilsons , and Mrs . Greys , and Madame Jouberts ! Mary was always too sleepy to join in a plot with spirit . The best fun was with Madame Joubert : Miss Wilson was a poor sickly thing , lachrymose and low-spirited , not worth the trouble of vanquishing , in short ; and Mrs . Grey was coarse and insensible ; no blow took effect on her . But poor Madame Joubert ! I see her yet in her raging passions , when we had driven her to extremities -- spilt our tea , crumbled our bread and butter , tossed our books up to the ceiling , and played a charivari with the ruler and desk , the fender and fire-irons . Theodore , do you remember those merry days ?"
" Yaas , to be sure I do ," drawled Lord Ingram ; " and the poor old stick used to cry out ' Oh you villains childs !' -- and then we sermonised her on the presumption of attempting to teach such clever blades as we were , when she was herself so ignorant ."
" We did ; and , Tedo , you know , I helped you in prosecuting ( or persecuting ) your tutor , whey-faced Mr . Vining -- the parson in the pip , as we used to call him . He and Miss Wilson took the liberty of falling in love with each other -- at least Tedo and I thought so ; we surprised sundry tender glances and sighs which we interpreted as tokens of ' la belle passion ,' and I promise you the public soon had the benefit of our discovery ; we employed it as a sort of lever to hoist our dead-weights from the house . Dear mama , there , as soon as she got an inkling of the business , found out that it was of an immoral tendency . Did you not , my lady-mother ?"
" Certainly , my best . And I was quite right : depend on that : there are a thousand reasons why liaisons between governesses and tutors should never be tolerated a moment in any well-regulated house ; firstly -- "
" Oh , gracious , mama ! Spare us the enumeration ! Au reste , we all know them : danger of bad example to innocence of childhood ; distractions and