CHAPTER XVI 202
" Listen , then , Jane Eyre , to your sentence : tomorrow , place the glass before you , and draw in chalk your own picture , faithfully , without softening one defect ; omit no harsh line , smooth away no displeasing irregularity ; write under it , ' Portrait of a Governess , disconnected , poor , and plain .'
" Afterwards , take a piece of smooth ivory -- you have one prepared in your drawing-box : take your palette , mix your freshest , finest , clearest tints ; choose your most delicate camel-hair pencils ; delineate carefully the loveliest face you can imagine ; paint it in your softest shades and sweetest lines , according to the description given by Mrs . Fairfax of Blanche Ingram ; remember the raven ringlets , the oriental eye ; -- What ! you revert to Mr . Rochester as a model ! Order ! No snivel ! -- no sentiment ! -- no regret ! I will endure only sense and resolution . Recall the august yet harmonious lineaments , the Grecian neck and bust ; let the round and dazzling arm be visible , and the delicate hand ; omit neither diamond ring nor gold bracelet ; portray faithfully the attire , aerial lace and glistening satin , graceful scarf and golden rose ; call it ' Blanche , an accomplished lady of rank .'
" Whenever , in future , you should chance to fancy Mr . Rochester thinks well of you , take out these two pictures and compare them : say , ' Mr . Rochester might probably win that noble lady ' s love , if he chose to strive for it ; is it likely he would waste a serious thought on this indigent and insignificant plebeian ?'"
" I ' ll do it ," I resolved : and having framed this determination , I grew calm , and fell asleep .
I kept my word . An hour or two sufficed to sketch my own portrait in crayons ; and in less than a fortnight I had completed an ivory miniature of an imaginary Blanche Ingram . It looked a lovely face enough , and when compared with the real head in chalk , the contrast was as great as self-control could desire . I derived benefit from the task : it had kept my head and hands employed , and had given force and fixedness to the new impressions I wished to stamp indelibly on my heart .