Issue No.21 - Polo De’Marco Magazine Issue No.21 - Dubai Edition | Page 251

11. Control Your Internal State Never allow internal feelings for an exceptionally beautiful woman to affect your outward actions or emotional responses. You must learn to manage your emotions and inner reactions very well and to separate them from your outer reaction. How do you do this; Breath calm & deeply, lean back and get physically relaxed. Find flaws with hot women or whoever you might be seen as higher status. It’s similar to when you have a hard breakup. We tend to idealise the other person and only see their positive. Make fun of them in a lighthearted way and view yourself and the room in a 3rd person (misidentifying from yourself and the situation). Another instance when you want to manage your inner and outer reactions is when beautiful women begin to pursue you. Yes, once you adopt this abundance mindset and traits they will start chasing you! In these situations, you also want to remain calm and relaxed as if it happens to you all the time. You reward hot women by first not judging them, and by being calm and collected they feel relaxed about chasing you too. So, manage your mental & emotional state and it will have a tremendous effect on your interactions with women. Try meditation as well to help relax and be more present in general. 12. Be a Great Communicator It is important to be assertive in your communication (fearless of what you want to do), be decisive (fearless of disagreement) and communicate what you believe. This is part of leading. Part of being a great communicator also means being a great listener. Get people talking about themselves, listen and ask more questions (everyone is their own favourite topic). As you listen and ask questions you’ll be able to lead conversations easily and have more room to banter with hot women since you won’t be doing all the talking. 13. Live in YOUR reality Be unaffected by outside events. This is similar to staying relaxed and unfazed by women’s looks or sexuality. A strong confident male always stays cool, calm and collected. Live in your reality and be rock solid in it. In this case, your reality is one of abundance and being extremely secure in yourself. Tip: Meditation and affirmations can help ground you and create confidence. 14. Be Comfortable in your own Skin In continuation of being confident, it is important to be comfortable in your own skin. This means in every regard such as sexually, how you look, your personality, and just being self- validated. It’s not just about being confident or comfortable about your strengths; it’s about being confident and comfortable with your weaknesses and insecurities too. Thus, making them into strengths. Anyone can be confident and show off what they have going well for themselves, but few can brag and make jokes about what used to be their insecurities or “weaknesses”. For example, if you are short, tall, fat, skinny, or whatever you think holds you back, tell yourself that it is “the hottest thing in the world” and it will be so. Then, once you feel good about that thing you’re insecure about start joking about it out loud as if it were a strength. Let’s say you’re short and a girl points it out, don’t fold, say “You have great observation skills…you might even be worth the climb”, as you give her a smile and look her right in the eyes. 15. Be a cause in the world not an effect This is such an important concept that will change your life. Basically, it’s about taking responsibility for your life, your state and your reality instead of always blaming outside events, circumstances or other people. Once you accept responsibility you accept control over your life. As Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, and your values become your destiny.” Tip: Here is an affirmation that has helped me over the years. “I do everything I want with enough authority and always get away with it. Everyone is a guest in my reality and I take responsibility for everything. I am a cause in the world.” 16. Know a little bit about a lot Part of having an abundant mindset and being a strong male is having multiple skill-sets, hobbies, interests and being cultured. Think of James Bond, he has vast skills and knowledge that he can adapt to any situation, culture or anything. You want to be the kind of guy that can walk into any place or any environment and fit in. Warning: This does NOT mean that you are a know it all or show off what you know. It simply means that if the situation arises you will probably have the skills to handle it confidently and comfortably. This doesn’t mean you pick up random hobbies or interests to impress women but rather you have an interesting life and live passionately. For example, traveling, dancing, martial arts or you love camping or cars etc. It doesn’t matter. Just know a little bit about different subjects that you are interested in. Living with passion will make you interesting and also, allow you to have more skills to adapt to life in general. 17. Don’t Put ALL Your Eggs in One Basket This next part of the abundance mindset and being a strong male can apply to every area of your life, not just dating hot women. Never invest in a single outcome or a single woman. This again, is in the context of when you are first starting to date someone. This is a big part of living in abundance; you can’t just bet it all in one woman especially since you don’t know if this woman is right for you yet. If for whatever reason it doesn’t work out with one woman you are left with nothing. Only give time, attention and energy to attractive women who are doing the same with you. Ignore all others and move on and only pay attention to those who pursue you. This is not about being with a ton of women unless that’s what you want, it is more about having options and then selecting from those options. As you begin to have options and become more selective you’ll learn to walk away from any hot woman if it doesn’t suit what you are looking for. This abundance mindset trait applies also when a woman breaks it off with you. Don’t keep going after her, trying to get her back and instead completely back-off/ move on.