Why are we so scared to connect the two?
We fall in love but are extremely nervous
to have sex because we’re worried it might
change things; we also have a lot of sex with
the same guy but refuse to get to know him
because we might fall in love with him. We’re
comfortable with either or, but never together.
Why can’t we break down the wall that di-
vides love and sex?
If you ask me it’s because we don’t know how
to let go of preconceptions and allow comfort
to settle in. Our habits, whether administered
by us or by others, has seeped into our cul-
ture, which makes us enter cautiously.
Not everyone is the same. There are count-
less of men who refuse to have a wall, that
thrive on deep emotional connections and
love to be
vulnerable in relationships. But when they’re deal
ing with others who aren’t it can be difficult not to
cave into their ideals.
Why has sex become currency?
We’re valued at how f*ckable we are. We’ve taken
the straight male POV towards women and turned
it on ourselves. In a way we’ve become the victim
of our own success. When a guy flirts with us, the
breaking factor that decides whether it’s creepy or
not isn’t his strategy, but how attractive we think
he is.
The more attractive people we have around us,
the more attractive we feel. Men are pack peo-
ple—we haven’t changed for thousands of years.
We feel more important when we’re associated
with stronger groups, and since we’ve placed such
value in looks, hot friends are naturally viewed as
“stronger.”
4GUYS.CA
53