INSIDER ' S INSIDE LOOK AT AA - JOSEPH HOLMES
This had me confused for a while, but this After the speaker is finished, it goes to the floor
explanation helped me to understand: no matter to give their thoughts on what they have heard.
how long you live, you cannot be recovered only Most importantly, how their stories relate. How
recovering. You live with the daily struggle that it they can learn. The speaker provides them with
could all come back. You could say you are no feedback and advice and moves on.
longer an alcoholic but then relapse tomorrow. The evening finishes with the awarding of
Thus addictions have to be battled continuously. sobriety tokens, chips are given out to represent
This is another reason why the meetings are the length of time sober. A reward, in operant
populated with sober alcoholics. My contact was conditioning, for good behaviour. Something to
the speaker for this meeting. Now over fifteen be proud of. Something for others to aspire to.
years sober, they have turned their life around and It’s late by the time it’s all over, clambering into
go to different AA meetings to use their story to the car, I check my phone. Too many messages
help others. The audience couldn’t be more from loved ones. I couldn’t respond. My head
understanding and non judgemental, they visibly was overloaded with reflection. I listened to the
moved when relating to a part of the story. speaker and started to think about my life, what
Speaking to people there, it helped them see that I should change. I was worried- I’m too young to
they face similar issues and that it is possible to have touched alcohol (call me sensible), so it
move forward and have a life. The newer faces, must be extremely bad that I’m having the
especially, seemed mesmerised. I glanced over at same problems? I couldn't reply to my loved
them with a mutual understanding that this was ones because I reflected on the times when I
not what we were expecting. I hate to say it, but it haven't been my best.
was almost an awakening. No. I realised that it is just mental health.
Why is it that we so rarely talk openly about our Without the 'just'. Though, when eating a overly
problems? plain takeaway burger at ten o’clock that night, I
Those still struggling saw the sober people in the couldn’t help but think that it would be easier
room as role models. Role models that aren’t to have something to blame my problems on.
perfect. That have made many mistakes- but are But AA taught me that the problem does not lie
now, on the whole, doing well. Many of the with the alcohol, it lies with you. You are the
struggles even non-alcoholics can relate to and only one who can change you. I thought a lot
learn from, just because the foundations lie in that night, it all seemed surreal. Maybe we need
human behaviour. After all, mental health does more time to just think and be mindful? I had a
not discriminate. At AA, there is no blaming the lot of thinking to do, I just hope it had the same
alcohol- the twelve steps work on admitting that effect on those suffering from alcoholism. I
you have a problem and taking responsibility. could see, even then, it was invaluable for me to
Alcohol isn’t made by the devil. If you drink go and observe, not just from a writing
excessively to the extent that it affects your perspective, but I now know where to point
functionality, there is a problem. Not with the people struggling with addiction. I can say full-
alcohol. With you. With your head, as they heartedly that there is nothing to be ashamed
described in the meeting. It can be helped, it of, it isn’t as scary as you expect and it might
might take time and patience, but the first step is just save your life.
admitting there is a problem. Then go to your first
meeting.
AA works and it has saved lives.
It certainly helped me.