the 19th hole
Gearing up...and down
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W
hen I was a young trainee golf
professional, being asked for
advice on golf equipment required
little more than offering a choice of “B51
or Hot Dot ball” or selecting one of the
three different types of clubs on display.
My advice was based on my estimation of
the customer’s previous year’s earnings and
whatever golf bag the boss had in stock.
Club fitting didn’t mean determining the
player’s launch angle, spin rate and the
distance between his armpit and buttock.
All I did was to ring my mate Simmo and ask
“When you played with Roy last week, did he
hit it past you?...No?… Ok, that means he’s
regular flex”. The putter usually came with the
set and if he needed shoes it was a choice of
Niblicks in black or Niblicks in white.
It’s pretty clear, golf has become a little more
scientific now but I’ve tried my level best to
stay up with all the modern equipment and
technology. You know… just in case some
poor person comes into the shop at Mount
Broughton and asks me for some advice on a
shaft or something. For an old bloke I thought
I was doing OK and often surprised myself
when I could explain the green shaft with
the yellow dots has a high kick point which
takes the spin off but the red and white one
that looks like it should be hanging outside a
Barber Shop is a low kicker.
Well that was until I walked into a huge retail
outlet the other day and became so emotional,
I finished up sitting in the golf shoes section in a
foetal position. When you see all the choices of
gear under one roof, it is absolutely terrifying!
The quick nine quiz
David Newbery
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He turned out to be perfectly normal
looking kid... except for the haircut which
looked like a divot I took in last Saturday’s
single stableford. To correctly fit me out with
a tee he asked what kind of ball I use. Silly
old me responded with “I’ve actually been
thinking of changing to another ball but I
think I know which one its going to be”.
Next thing I know, I’m standing in front of
a giant wall of golf balls. The first thought
that came to mind was, I hope my final
choice isn’t anywhere near the bottom of this
construction. If Divot-Head pulls one out to
show me, the whole building could collapse!
“What swing speed are you, sir?” he asked.
I always find this question a little invasive.
Like something I should only be telling my
doctor—hopefully when he isn’t wearing a
glove on one hand. My standard response is
always “aaah, it was 108 mph but it hasn’t been
checked for a while.” (actually it was 1996).
After some more interrogation, FescueFringe suggested a ball which has been
designed to have the best aerodynamic
performance for Tour-level swing speeds. (I
knew I could trade them in back at Mount
Broughton for ones designed for “senior”
Tour-level swing speeds). The dimple pattern
is specifically engineered to reduce distancerobbing drag at high speeds to produce long,
stable, penetrating ball flight while offering
spin on short irons and check with pitch and
chip shots as well as soft feel for putting….
And it was near the top of the wall!
“But it all depends on what type of driver you
use, sir...” he threw in at the end. By this point
I’m wondering if there’s a driver big enough for
my wife and I to live in because I would have to
mortgage the house before I leave the store.
I took one more look at Turf Top and
thought it wa