CHARACTER EDUCATION
5 . Emotional regulation
• The more we can separate ourselves from our thoughts and emotions , the clearer our minds will be able to talk back to them . Feeling something does not define us – there is another ‘ us ’ underneath . ( Spira , 2023 )
• If students are choosing risky or self-harming behaviours , they could note their behaviours and question whether they were unhelpfully impulsive . Teach them how to reframe negative thoughts and emotions into something more realistic and positive ( Fletcher and Sarker , 2013 ).
• Can students be encouraged to foster self-control through therapy , slowing breath rhythm , mindfulness , the 54321 method ( Calm Kids , 2022 ), and meditation ?
6 . Develop social connectivity
• Evidence shows that resilience growth also occurs at a group level ( Morgan et al 2013 ). Can students reflect on the language people in their friendship group use around stress ? Can they see stressful situations that occur in a group as a chance to learn and to grow ? ( Fletcher et al 2017 )
• Connectedness helps trigger our parasympathetic nervous system which regulates our emotions . Invite students to record ‘ connection ’ moments - where they have perhaps used humour , despite experiencing challenging times , or addressed conflict as soon and as calmly as possible .
• Teach students to be the friends they wish they had themselves .
Mental Fortitude Training TM Table 2 . Thought regulation strategies
Stop
Stop negative thoughts by simply thinking ‘ stop !’ or similar thoughts such as ‘ don ’ t go there ’, ‘ take control ’, or wait a minute ’. Be assertive . For maximum effect , use imagery to reinforce the statements , such as visualising a red ‘ stop ’ sign
Verbalise Expose negativity by telling someone about your thinking . Ensure that this person will help you confront any irrationality and replace with more positive thoughts .
Park
‘ Park ’ any negative thoughts by writing them down or drawing pictures of what they represent , and either disposing of them or putting them aside in an envelope to be confronted later .
Confront Challenge any irrationality by asking questions (‘ have I got all the information ?’, ‘ is there another way to view this situation ?’, ‘ what is the worst thing that could happen ?’, ‘ if I had a month to live , how important would this be ?’). Sometimes this is easier if you imagine ( a ‘ better ’ version of ) yourself or someone you respect asking such questions to you in a safe place . Alternatively , switch it around by imagining a close friend who is talking negatively ( similar to your thoughts ) and what rational , encouraging support you would provide . At some point , however , it is likely that you will need to take ownership of your thoughts and focus on making choices that you have probably forgotten you have .
Replace
Once negative thoughts are eliminated , minimised or parked , you need to replace them with positive thoughts and images . These thoughts should ideally focus on what is in your control , on processes , the present , what ’ s positive , and staying composed . If thinking about your performance is proving too difficult , then distract yourself by doing and / or thinking about something completely different , and thinking about your performance later .
7 . Teach empathy
• Acknowledging others who have experienced hardships can help students build empathy .
• Acts of service help us to feel more connected , needed and important .
• Ask students to express what has changed their perspective around discrimination , stereotypes , comparison and judging .
Fletcher , D and Sarkar , M . ( 2013 ) 8 . Teach perseverance
• Resilient students show commitment to their activities . “ The ability to persevere … is probably the most important trait for not only succeeding in life , but for enjoying it too ” ( Csikszentmihalyi , 2002 ).
• Research shows the process of “ privately clarifying , publicly articulating , and consciously acting ” on a set of values helps people deal with adversity ( Patterson , and Kelleher , 2005 ). This means focusing on what is within rather than what is externally validated e . g . through comparison or validated from social media .
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