INhonolulu Magazine Issue #15 - March 2014 | Page 36

THE HAWAII
INDEPENDENT
Hawaii’s progressive voice.

From page 35

shame on you, fool me twice, shame
on me.

comes to abuse, the policy is also “not
even once.”

4) Don’t make the same mistakes
over and over

5) Don’t ever allow it to get physical

6) Don’t ever stop making love

Forgiveness of even the first offense
is out of the question. If your partner gets physical toward you with his
or her frustrations, it’s time to walk
away before it gets any worse. Abuse
is never to be tolerated for any reason
whatsoever. Just like the individuals
battered by meth in the hauntingly
dark anti-meth commercials, people in abusive relationships can feel
trapped and unable to escape. And,
just like meth, remember that when it

I know I said above that relationships are about more than sex, and
that is certainly true. But once the
romance and intimacy goes out the
window, you might as well hang
out with your buddies. Whether it
is hard, raunchy sex or soft kisses
while snuggling beneath the sheets,
once the intimacy strays, so too
does your partner’s attention. So
don’t ever stop getting down—especially on Valentine’s Day. ■

Relationships are about learning. The
delay of necessary change is too often
the pitfall of many relationships. Mistakes are made—it’s part of life—and
forgiveness is essential. But making
the same mistake over and over again
will get tiring for even the most patient of significant others. As the old
adage goes “something something
once, shame on you, blah blah blah
twice, shame on me.” Fool me once,
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