INDUSTRY INSIGHT
SENIOR CARE
How to Convince Your
Parents When it’s Time
to Move…
H
olidays are a great time for family and friends to get together. They
can also be a time for adult children to assess their parents’ health
care needs and determine if they are still safe to live at home alone.
We all want to stay in our own homes. However as our parents get older,
it’s not always in their best interest. So how do you talk with your parents
about the realities, and, in some cases, the dangers of staying at home
once their health is failing? And, how do you convince them that it’s time
to think about moving to a senior care community?
Discuss how worried you are about them. Enlist the help of other
siblings and family members. Schedule a family meeting and state your
case for this move. Tell them how much you love and care about them,
and how much better everyone in the family would feel if they moved to a
senior care or personal care community. (Sometimes third parties, such as
physicians and spiritual leaders, can make headway when family meetings
fail.)
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Show interest and generate excitement for their new home. Ask
about bringing furniture from home and how much room there is. Take
measuring tape and visualize how your parents’ room(s) would look. Show
excitement, as you would do if you were helping your parents move to
any new home, because that’s what you are doing.
Leaving a home where one has lived with a life partner, raised kids, and
once had friends among the neighbors is emotionally difficult. Whittling
down a lifetime of possessions is hard. So be sensitive to your parents’
feelings. With love, guidance and support, moving your loved ones to a
care community could be one of the best decisions your family has ever
made. For more information on ways to talk with your parents about
moving, or to schedule a complimentary tour, contact Juniper Village
at Forest Hills at 412.244.9901.
Watch for a “teachable moment.” Did Mom or Dad recently fall? Have
they been having trouble remembering to take their medications? Are
they having trouble at home because of steps? Use these situations as
teachable moments and times to discuss moving. Discuss how concerned
you are about their safety. Suggest perhaps a few of you could go look at
some senior living or personal care communities. Explain how you would
all feel better if they had people around. Go with your gut on the timing,
but use the “moment” to your advantage.
Plant the seed. Don’t approach your parents as though you’ve already
made the decision for them. Just mention that there are options that
could make life easier and more fun.
Offer to take them to look at some local senior care communities.
If they are willing to look, get in the car and go! You don’t need an
appointment. Potential residents are always welcome to stop by and look
around. Most visitors and their families are pleasantly surprised at how
nice today’s personal care and assisted living communities are. If they are
not willing to go, don’t push it. Drop the subject and wait for another day.
Check with your friends and your parents’ friends. Find out if any of
them are living in a senior or personal care community nearby. Call and
make plans to visit. Just like the first day of school – your parents would
feel much better and the transition will be much easier if there are friends
already living at the community.
Schedule a visit around an activity that your parents enjoy. Most
communities offer a variety of activities seven days a week. Show off the
social aspects of the community and how much fun it would be to have
things to do every day. Keep it light and don’t force the issue.
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