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them out of an experience that they deserve . So I got to a place where I went , “ You know what ? I need some time .” So I canceled everything , and I went home so I could process and grieve in my own time . And as soon as I started to get my feet back on the ground — I had written a couple of songs . I was calling Kato , saying we ought to get in the studio , that I had to record something to get me out of this funk — but as soon as I started to get those plans in motion , I got the call saying that Kato had died in a motorcycle accident . And that hit me in a completely different way , where I spiraled down so fast and so quickly that it was just a wall of blackness , depression , and substance abuse — everything that comes with grief and trauma and loss . And I didn ’ t know how to get out of it . I sank so far down so fast . But I think the scarier part was that I didn ’ t know if I really wanted to — I had kind of hit a point where I had just given up on life . Like , “ Everything I love is dead , so what ’ s the fucking point ?” Then I kind of threw my hands up in the air , and I quit . I quit life . And the scary part was that I got very content with just fading into nothing . I was very comfortable with that being my future .
IE : Were you living alone in Maine ? With nobody there to notice your descent ? TM : No , I was living alone at my house . I mean , granted , the band lives fairly close — we ’ re all in New England . But I had isolated myself . I was in a place where I didn ’ t want to talk to anyone ; I didn ’ t want to see anyone . I didn ’ t want help — I wanted to , not wallow , but just be alone . So anything from the outside world was too much for me to handle , and I got to a point where I couldn ’ t listen to music , and that was really sad for me . That was a bad place . And I mean anything — from Soundgarden to The Beatles to Led Zeppelin to whoever , everything I loved . If I put on any music — which has always brought me such solace and hope and light — it would bring back some sort of memory which was too much for me to handle , or too painful , so I didn ’ t have my outlet which had always been there for me . I just couldn ’ t face it . And I think I finally hit rock bottom of sorts where I found myself really needing music , in the same way , that I need food and water and oxygen . I needed rock and roll in my life again . So I started at the beginning , and it was kind of a slow process . But I started by listening to the first band I fell in love with , which was The Beatles , and listening to everything they ever recorded — all the records , then the demos , then the anthology , everything I could get my hands , and from there just going down the line of my musical history of all the bands I fell in love with . Like I said , Led Zeppelin , and then Pink Floyd and The Who , AC / DC and Jimi Hendrix , Eric Clapton and The Doors , and Oasis and Bob Dylan and Neil Young . And eventually Soundgarden . I got to a place where I could listen to Soundgarden again and have it bring me joy . And that was the first little turning point , where I could pick up the guitar , which was the next natural step . I picked up the guitar and started playing music again , and as I started to play music again , unintentionally , this record just kind of … poured out of me . I don ’ t think I even had an intention of writing this album — it
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was like the floodgates opened , whether I wanted them to or not with this record . I didn ’ t have to try to write it — it was like a stream of consciousness that just flowed out of me , of everything that I had been repressing and holding inside , things I ’ d been denying that I was holding inside for months and months until they finally just overflowed . That ’ s really where this album was born . And when I finished writing the record , that was the big leap and huge step forward for me , where I really started to feel like myself because I turned back to what I know — writing songs has always been the place where I found catharsis . It ’ s always been the place that I can turn to to find my center and my balance . And without that , I was just very lost . But as soon as I went back to my roots and returned to that again , this friend in music that I had in music that had always been there , that ’ s when I started to see the light come back into my eyes again . So this record quite literally saved my life in many ways . And I think that one of the reasons that rock and roll is such a forever art form and it can never die is because it delves into subject matter and territory that other music doesn ’ t always do . It deals with things that are uncomfortable to speak about and maybe taboo to talk about and confronts them head-on in a way that can be very healing for the listener and really make you not feel alone in the struggle of life .
IE : Well , you ’ ve touched on this thematically and metaphorically , but have you ever gotten into Wicca or any kind of white witchcraft ? TM : Not really . I mean , I ’ ve got my candles and stuff . But I wish that shit was real . I watch Buffy all the time , and I wish I could be Willow . That would be awesome . If I could actually be a witch , by all means , I would be floating pencils left and right . But when I was a kid , I had sleepovers and stuff , and of course , you played all those games , and when we lost people , I certainly dabbled in ouija boards and all the spirit boxes and everything . But I never really got a response , so I kind of gave up on that side of things . But I do think the memory and the spirit of people live on in a way that we don ’ t understand . And I don ’ t consider myself a religious person by any means , but I think that we ’ d be remiss to say that we know ANYTHING . That ’ s why it ’ s so important to focus on the memory of people who are no longer here , because by talking about them and saying their name , you ’ re keeping their spirit alive , somewhere .
IE : And you get visited by them in dreams . TM : That happens way too much . I ’ m kind of an insomniac , and I can ’ t sleep because I just … I have very , very vivid dreams that leave me in really weird moods when I wake up . And sometimes they ’ re great , sometimes they ’ re awful , and sometimes it ’ s way too much . Like , I ’ ve dreamt very vividly since I was a young child , and I used to keep a notebook by my bed because I would write songs in my sleep . I would just jot them down while I was still asleep and then wake up , and they didn ’ t make any sense to me at all .
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Continued from page 14 has held them back , allowing them to come together , finally forming an unprecedented league of heroes . Now united , Batman ( Affleck ), Wonder Woman ( Gadot ), Aquaman ( Jason Momoa ), Cyborg ( Ray Fisher ), and The Flash ( Ezra Miller ) may be too late to save the planet from Steppenwolf , DeSaad , and Darkseid and their dreadful intentions .
Nobody
Directed by Ilya Naishuller Rated R March 26th - In Theaters
Sometimes the man you don ’ t notice is the most dangerous of all . Emmy winner Bob Odenkirk ( Better Call Saul , The Post , Nebraska ) stars as Hutch Mansell , an underestimated and overlooked dad and husband , taking life ’ s indignities on the chin and never pushing back . A nobody . When two thieves break into his suburban home , Hutch declines to defend himself or his family , hoping to prevent serious violence . His teenage son , Blake ( Gage Munroe ), is disappointed in him and his wife , Becca ( Connie Nielsen ), seems to pull further away . The aftermath of the incident strikes a match to Hutch ’ s long-simmering rage , triggering dormant instincts and propelling him on a brutal path that will surface dark secrets and lethal skills . Also starring RZA , Aleksey Serebryakov , and Christopher Lloyd .
Godzilla vs . Kong
Directed by Adam Wingard Rated PG-13 March 31st - In Theaters and Streaming HBOMax
Legends collide as these mythic adversaries meet in a spectacular battle for the ages , with the fate of the world hanging in the balance . Kong and his protectors undertake a perilous journey to find his true home , and with them is Jia , a young orphaned girl with whom he has formed a unique and powerful bond . But they unexpectedly find themselves in the path of an enraged Godzilla , cutting a swath of destruction across the globe . The epic clash between the two titans — instigated by unseen forces — is only the beginning of the mystery that lies deep within the Earth ' s core . Starring Alexander Skarsgård , Kyle Chandler , Millie Bobby Brown , and Rebecca Hall .