Lisbeth continued to stare at her hands.
“Lis.” Jake said.
She felt her chair turn sideways; Jake came into her vision, sitting cross legged. He grabbed both of her hands in his own.
“Lisbeth.” He whispered her name.
“I just want to be healthy,” Lisbeth said.
“Who says you’re not?”
“Look at me.” She could barely choke the words out as the tears overwhelmed her.
Jake leaned forward and closed his eyes till they were mere slits, and then he opened them wide. He sat back and asked “What am I looking for?” He gave her a half grin that stoked the desire she felt for him.
“I’m a big ass fatty,” Lisbeth said.
“And?”
“And eventually that’s gonna get boring and you’re gonna want someone who’s Dora’s size that can do the things I can’t.”
“Dora?” He turned his head away from her. She watched him fiddle with the hem of his wife beater, which always signaled to her he was deep in thought. “Dora? You think I’m attracted to your cousin?” His lips curled in disgust.
“I see the way you look at her, and I can’t help, but notice the two of you have gotten very close these past few weeks.”
“She seems like she’s very troubled to me. The barely clothed clothing she wears screams insecurity, I was just trying to cheer her up.”
Lisbeth frowned. It had seemed like more than cheering up to her.
“Look, I think I’m beginning to understand. Your cousin waltzes in here talking about all the weight she’s lost and you want to join the club, but what’s wrong with the size you are?”
Lisbeth began to explain, but Jake cut off her words.
“Growing up I’m guessing you always wanted to be thin, am I right?” Lisbeth nodded yes. “Well growing up I always wanted to be big. I wanted big muscles. I could never put any significant weight on these babies. I was a scrawny kid my whole life. Too thin to join the wrestling or football team, and my two left feet kicked me out of junior basketball. I didn’t fit in anywhere and I couldn’t date any girls, because they all wanted to date the jocks. Thirteen years later I’m still lean, no matter what I eat or how much I work out.”
He leaned forward and rested his hands on her thighs. “What I’m trying to say is, this is the way I’m made. I’d be lying if I said I loved you despite your size, I’m in love and attracted to everything about you.”