If and Only If: A Journal of Body Image and Eating Disorders Winter 2015 | Page 125

Jessica Martini

28 Lines

Diagnosed

a woman

she received poetry

because of the blood

without cycle, no poetry,

she wrote in the sober awareness

following the pain

which had blinded

her to whatever still-life

whatever motion

Without cycle,

no yearning

only

production

of the same results

a victory that is described,

by either the paying customer

or the chief executive officer

someone with gold stars to return

And time-off to give

for agony

A frequent death – a cycle –

ensures an artist not

a worker,

ensures a desperate pilgrimage not

a routine,

ensures

she will notice again.