FOUR THINGS WE GET WRONG ABOUT
MENTORSHIP
BY KENT EVANS
Author of WISE GUYS: Unlocking the Hidden Wisdom from the Men Around
You.
I love the topic of mentorship. I especially
love the topic of protégéship (man, that really
oughtta be a word).
I find that most of us – especially my fellow
guys – are not highly skilled at tapping into
wiser minds. I believe this is primarily due to
pride and ego.
But, in addition, I think we also carry wrong
assumptions about mentorship that can keep
us from diving in. Here are four of them:
1)
We expect the mentor to be perfect in
every sense
2)
We assume the relationship must last
forever
3)
We fear we must follow every recommendation
4)
We wait around until the mentor selects us
Expecting perfection
We know this fantastic strategy guy at work.
He can think outside the box, synthesize gobs
of information into simple paths forward, and
present to management like a champ.
However, he’s not usually on time for meetings. So, instead of diving in and learning his
approach to strategy, we just write him off as
a slacker and keep our distance.
This baby-out-with-the-bathwater approach
is usually a defense mechanism employed by
our pride. It helps us justify learning nothing
from anyone but the unblemished. And, who
does this leave as a potential mentor? Exactly. No one.
You can learn just “one thing” from a mentor. The mentor-messiah is a myth. Let’s ap24 PAGE | ICONIC MAGAZINE
proach capable leaders to learn, not only accept counsel from the flawless.
Relationship duration
When approaching a mentor, you aren’t creating a lifelong pact. You mustn’t be attached
to this person until death do you part.
Your engagement may be for three years or
only three lunches. When you sense the relationship has run its course, it’s perfectly fine
to back off.
Do not keep meeting just for meeting’s sake.
Follower’s requirement
Sometimes we believe that as the protégé we
are signing over our entire life to the mentor.
Whatever she says, we must do, without objection. We will become the mindless pawn,