IBA SUCCESS MAGAZINE Issue 4 Vol 3 | Page 24

Will You Be Made Whole... Overcoming Domestic Abuse I want to share a word that will prayerfully bring hope made it through. to those who may have lost hope, healing to those who are wounded or broken, and faith to those whose faith is I now find that I can not only identify myself as a wife or mother, faltering or altogether lost. but as a woman -whole, complete, in and of myself without having to be slotted in a role. I sometimes wonder how often we lose I will share a brief portion of my journey on the road our identity without realizing it. Many want to be healed from the to healing and being made whole. I exist today as a free devastating effects of being abused by the one who vowed to love woman in mind, body, soul and spirit. I had been in bondage them forever. Many want to be healed. But how many want to be spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically for most of made whole? Being made whole encompasses more than just a my life. physical healing. Whole is defined as being complete, including all parts or aspects, with NOTHING left out. In order to be whole, one You see, we all have a void within us that can only be filled must be physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy. If by a relationship with the Lord. Try as we may to fill it any of these areas are lacking, there is an imbalance. with other things – sex, money, drugs, food, shopping, etc. Whatever your addiction of choice may be, while it might The journey to being made whole is not an easy or painless process work temporarily, I guarantee it won’t be long before you especially if you’ve been in an abusive relationship. Aside from begin cultivating another fix or another addiction. Why? trying to recover from the physical effects of being abused, the Because you desire to have that void filled. All of us have a psychological wounds are much more devastating and take much void that can only be filled by a relationship with the Lord. longer to heal from. However, once you’ve been made whole, that isn’t the end of the journey - the journey is really just beginning at I had no idea who I was all those years ago when I made this point. In order to maintain that state, you must replace your the decision to get married. I didn’t know what I wanted out addictions with the Word of God. Otherwise, even though you’ve of life or what I wanted to do with my life. I think getting been swept clean on the inside, when you hit a rough patch, what married was a security blanket for me and in becoming a will you fall back on? Old habits, behaviors and addictions? As it wife, I received a role to fulfill. I was a wife and mother, I had says in Matthew 12:43-45, “Now when the unclean spirit goes out a family to take care of. I found my identity in that. of a man, it passes through waterless places seeking rest, and does not find it. Then it says ‘I will return to my house from which I When that sense of family was stripped away by a 25- came…’ Then it goes an takes along with it seven other spirits more year prison sentence for my husband of 17 years, I had no wicked than itself, and they go in an live there; and the last state of idea how to function. For the first year after everything the man becomes worse that the first” (NASB). happened, I literally laid on the floor crying every day while my daughter was at school. It was a difficult process, but I So, how do we avoid this? We can do so by renewing our minds daily with the Word of God. The old adage about two halves making a whole as it relates to healthy relationships is not conducive to a strong healthy relationship. Neither is the old saying that the best cure for being healed from a negative relationship or messy breakup is to find a new love. Two halves within the context of a relationship equates to two emotionally co-dependent, half-healed people attempting to make a whole - that is a recipe for disaster. I will leave you with this question: Will you be made whole? Michelle Poitier USN Veteran, Founder, Executive Director of Healing Women Healing Nations​ NE Florida Inc. (HWHN NE FL) is a non-profit organization serving the greater Jacksonville, FL, area. HWHN currently provides social service and resource referrals. The ultimate purpose is to provide suitable transitional housing for homeless female veterans and their children. Join Michelle Poitier, a 13-year U.S. Navy military veteran, mother, grandmother, entrepreneur, author, motivational speaker and advocate as she takes you on a journey to healing and wholeness. If you’re seeking words of hope and encouragement and release from pains of the past, join Michelle in her voice of commitment as she advocates for survivors of domestic AND sexual abuse, homelessness among female veterans, and those battling with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and military sexual trauma (MST). www.hwhnfl.org • [email protected] 904-370-3549 24 IBASuccessMagazine.com