Huffington Magazine Issue 89 | Page 49

HUFFINGTON 02.23.14 THRIVE commencement speeches very seriously. It’s such a special moment for the graduating class—a pause, a kind of parenthesis in time following four (or five, or six) years of nonstop learning and growing just before the start of an adult life spent moving forward and putting all of that knowledge into action. It’s a unique marker in their lives—and for fifteen minutes or so I have the graduates’ undivided attention. The challenge is to say something equal to the occasion, something that will be useful during a charged time of new beginnings. “Commencement speakers,” I told the women graduates, “are traditionally expected to tell the graduating class how to go out there and climb the ladder of success. But I want to ask you instead to redefine success. Because the world you are headed into desperately needs it. And because you are up to the challenge. Your education at Smith has made it unequivocally clear that you are entitled to take your place in the world wherever you want that place to be. You can work in any field, and you can make it to the top of any field. But what I urge you to do is not just take your place at the top of the world, but to change the world.” The moving response to the speech made me realize how widespread is the longing among so many of us to redefine success and what it means to lead “the good life.” “What is a good life?” has been a question asked by philosophers going back to the ancient Greeks. But somewhere along the line w e abandoned the question and shifted our attention to how much money we can make, how big a house we can buy, and how high we can climb up the career ladder. Those are legitimate questions, particularly at a time when women are still attempting to gain an equal seat at the table. But as I painfully discovered, they are far from the only questions that matter in creating a successful life. Over time our society’s notion of success has been reduced to money and power. In fact, at this point, success, money, and power have practically become synonymous in the minds of many. This idea of success can work— or at least appear to work—in the short term. But over the long term, money and power by themselves are like a two-legged stool—you can balance on them for a while, but eventually you’re going to topple over. And more and more people—very successful