Huffington Magazine Issue 84 | Page 51

HOW TO BE A PARENT... HUFFINGTON 01.19.14 PREVIOUS PAGE: GETTY IMAGES/FLICKR OPEN BY CATHERINE PEARSON When she gazes at her 4-monthold daughter, Toni finds it hard to believe that her own father has not reached out to her for months. Growing up, the 24-year-old preschool teacher from Texas had a strained relationship with her father. He was an alcoholic, she said, who frequently lied to her and struggled with mental health issues. When her parents divorced in 2012, Toni recognized an opportunity to sever ties. Last September, not long after her own daughter was born, she wrote her father a letter, explaining that she no longer wanted any contact with him. “Part of my thinking was, ‘I don’t want to voluntarily put bad people in my daughter’s life,” Toni said. “I kind of see it as protecting her.” Toni was surprised and hurt when she didn’t hear from her father. A part of her, however small, thought her letter might spur him to action. “I look at my daughter and I say, ‘I don’t care what she says to me, I could never not be a part of her life,” said Toni, who like all of the estranged adults in this article, asked that only her first name be used. “Sometimes, I don’t know whether I’m sad or angry. … Right now, I think I’m both.” There are no clear estimates of how many grown children in the U.S. are estranged from their parents, either by their own choice or their parents’. But experts say estrangement is on the rise, and far more common than is widely believed, presenting challenges for a new generation of men and women on the brink of parenthood. Estrangement is neither an illness nor a condition that can be diagnosed, but the fracturing of a family can be no less devastating — and there are no clear treat-