Voices
he was gay. My mom was crying.
She told him not to tell anybody
else, just in case he changed his
mind. She told him that he was
going to Hell. I started to cry too.
What was happening to our family
and my reality?
Now I get emotional with our
mother when she cries and feels
like a failure because of her reaction when Michael came out.
Once things are said and done,
they can’t be unspoken or undone;
it’s one of life’s tragedies.
Our mother also regrets showing me that having a gay family
member was something to hide,
for being less than brave and for
placing such importance on trying to please other people. She’s
said that, at times, her love for
her kids didn’t triumph over what
others would think or say. We’ve
talked about all of this, and I
promised her that I’ll do better,
that I won’t repeat her mistakes,
that the lessons that she has
learned will be put to use by me
for the sake of her grandchildren
should they be LGBTQ.
I have two boys. My youngest
son C.J. was two and half when he
started, as he explains it, being “a
boy who only likes girl stuff and
wants to be treated like a girl.”
LORI
DURON
HUFFINGTON
09.22.13
How could it be? How could
our family have another boy who
liked everything about being a
girl? It’s history repeating itself,
to a certain extent. I have to make
sure that only the good parts of
the history live on.
Since C.J. started revealing his
inner princess, Michael and I have
had numerous talks about our
childhood and what a child like
C.J. — and Michael — needs from
Is it possible for
a homosexual person to
never have to come out
of the closet? I don’t mean
staying closeted forever;
I mean never even
entering the closet.”
a parent. My brother and I have
grown even closer than we already
were, which I would have never
thought possible.
Even though I was right there
growing up with Michael, I was
oblivious to a lot. I talked to him
about our childhood. I learned that
he felt like he was in survival mode
for much of his life. He had secrets,
he had shame, and he felt like he
made every family photo ugly, all