Huffington Magazine Issue 64-65 | Page 75

HUFFINGTON 09.01-08.13 COURTESY OF MIKE MCMICHAEL INVISIBLE CASUALTIES wouldn’t give up on me. My husband is a hero and he feels immense pride at what he did over there.” Still, she said in a quiet moment, being in the military “you give up so much. I try not to think about it in terms of sacrifice.” As with many who’ve considered suicide, there’s no single, overpowering factor that keeps Mike back from the abyss. No head-smacking insight. No one wrestled him to the ground and took him in handcuffs to the VA. Nothing that dramatic. Instead it is the constant and steady presence of his wife, friends and other veterans. And his kids. The patient work of doctors and therapists at the VA and elsewhere who help Mike deal with pain and frustration. And — crucially important to those at risk of suicide — the absence of guns in his house. Quick access to firearms is the number one factor in suicides among service members and veterans. Sixty percent of military suicides in 2011 were by firearm, according to the Defense Department’s most recent annual report. Jackie, Mike believes, saved his life. He owes her, and their four “My brother used to say, ‘Why do you stay with him?’” Jackie said one day. “Because the man I married wouldn’t give up on me. My husband is a hero…” children, big time. “It’s been rough for me, but nothing compared to what I put them through,” he said. “What they’ve seen dad go through ... I apologize to them, because they never know which dad they’re going to get. I can go off like that! And sometimes I don’t realize it until I see the ★