Huffington Magazine Issue 54 | Page 12

Enter diminished from there. So the man who would rebrand his party has abruptly decided to rebrand himself. With that comes a new plan for the GOP, which he helpfully laid out in Politico: At some point, the American public is going to revolt against ... the leftward march of this president. I don’t know when the tipping point will come, but I believe it will come soon ... the left wants: The government to explode; to pay everyone; to hire everyone; they believe that money grows on trees; the earth is flat; the industrial age, factory-style government is a cool new thing; debts don’t have to be repaid; people of faith are ignorant and uneducated; unborn babies don’t matter; pornography is fine; traditional marriage is discriminatory; 32 oz. sodas are evil; red meat should be rationed; rich people are evil unless they are from Hollywood or are liberal Democrats; the Israelis are unreasonable; trans-fat must be stopped; kids trapped in failing schools should be patient; wild weather is a new thing; moral standards are passé; government run health care is high LOOKING FORWARD IN ANGST HUFFINGTON 06.23.13 quality; the IRS should violate our constitutional rights; reporters should be spied on; Benghazi was handled well; the Second Amendment is outdated; and the First one has some problems too. “Eventually,” Jindal says, “Americans will rise up against this new era of big government and this new reign of politically correct terror.” What to do until then? A funny thing happened while Jindal was staking out turf as his party’s most serious critic — his popularity and clout diminished.” “Put on your big boy pants,” says Jindal, helpfully and substantively. The short version of Jindal’s new plan for GOP renewal, then, is basically 1) attack a bunch of straw men; 2) sit back and chill and enjoy a well-fitting pair of trousers; and 3) profit. This is a far cry from the Bobby Jindal who suggested “we might need to change just about everything else we do,” but I guess Bobby Jindal has had enough of that guy.