Huffington Magazine Issue 2 | Page 42

> ROMANCE PREDATORS says Monica Whitty, a psychologist and professor at the University of Leicester in England. Such connections can be “more intimate than a face-to-face relationship…People self-disclose a lot more information than they normally would.” Although romantic predators target every demographic, from 20-somethings to women in their ‘30s, Nikolas Savage, an agent with the FBI, says the majority of victims appear to be somewhat older women in their 40s and 50s and they tend to be the ones who lose the most money. But other analysts aren’t entirely certain about the demographics of romantic scams because only a portion of the victimized population is willing to come forward and HUFFINGTON 06.24.12 discuss their plights or to take legal action. Whitty recently studied 466 romance scam victims from a sample of around 1,200 online daters and found that older women weren’t any more likely to fall for predators. In general, the victims she encountered had one overlapping characteristic, and it wasn’t their age or their gender. “Romantic beliefs,” are the common trait, says Whitty. “The people who believe that there is an ideal perfect person out there are the people who are more prone to being victims of the scam.” For her part, Bourgeois, who is 41, says she recognizes all of this about herself. “I watch romance movies a lot, and I would say that I would like to have something like that. Maybe that’s not realistic, but I believe in romance, I really do,” she says. “And I believe in love at first sight.” THE NIGERIAN CONNECTION Mary Wheaton, a divorced, 51-year-old from Grand Rapids, Mich., is a woman of faith, and one night, though she still can’t say why, she felt compelled to click on a Match.com advertisement that popped up on her computer screen. Wheaton soon connected with a man named Terry Donald Slyd. In the very first message Slyd sent her on Match. com, Wheaton says, he suggested the two talk on IM instead. “Within three days, he already was