How to Coach Yourself and Others Techniques For Coaching | Page 58

Guidelines for Giving Feedback Giving feedback is a delicate communication, because there is always the risk of people interpreting feedback as a personal critic directed against whom and how they are, instead of taking it as useful information on something they did. The best way to give feedback is to avoid “you-statements” and use “I-statements” instead: 1. 2. 3. 4. Give a specific description of the concrete behavior Tell how it made you feel Explain why (because…) Describe the desired consequence 1. Be specific and support general statements with specific examples. The receiver of feedback for both positive and negative behavior will be better able to act on statements that are precise and concise. Example: “During this month you have improved a lot.” This may be satisfying for both parties but it’s not as effective as saying, “Your reports were on time and better proofread.” 2. Describe the facts and do not judge. Describing the facts helps the receiver to understand the meaning and the importance of the feedback. It tends to focus the discussion on behavior and not on personal characteristics. Example: “Did you prepare for your meeting with the grantee? For me it looked like you did not. It was not organized.” This type of statement can bring anger, return accusations, or passive–aggressive behavior in the 366