How to Coach Yourself and Others Techniques For Coaching | Page 223

intervention with the data I had observed (e.g. the client’s energy level
shift).
4. How much to disclose
• As a general rule, less is always better than more. In the event that
you have a number of responses that you could make, it pays to keep
paying attention to your own evolving reactions for a while, and
eventually something will begin to stand out (e.g. a particularly strong
image or sensation), or what started as multiple reactions will suddenly
synthesise into a single and, therefore, potentially potent response.
Guidelines for Practice: a summary
1. Tune into yourself: what impact does the client have on you?
2. Selectively disclose in service of the client;
3. Trust the validity of your self disclosure;
4. Check the impact this has on the client, what meaning it holds for
them;
5. Don’t be too attached to your reaction. Be prepared to let it go if it
has little/no resonance for the client;
6. Use supervision as a place to talk through strong reactions you have
to your clients and the issues they bring.
5. Examples:
The outside world seems to think that after two weeks you should go
on as if nothing happened. I can't do that. Nothing seems fun anymore
since my mother died and all I can think of are her last days.
I understand. When my mother died, it took me quite some time to
get over it. I did notice that after a while, the good memories about
her came back, and that I could enjoy them again.
I am afraid to speak in public. The times that I had to do it, I broke out
in such a sweat I virtually floated of the stage.
Fear of failure, stage fright, fear of speaking in public - a lot of
people are troubled by it. I shall let you in on a secret. When I first
started, I had to give a seminar about counselling in a big firm to
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