How to Coach Yourself and Others Techniques For Coaching | Page 221
hunch that keeps running through your thoughts, if left undisclosed,
might lead you to feel distracted and so less present with the client.
• If a feeling, image etc. has persisted with this client during the session
or over the time you have known him or her, it is important you chose
to disclose when it emerges once more in the current session, because
there will be reason that it has come back to you ‘right now’ and this is
the context that can help you and the client make sense of the data.
Sharing an image that occurred to you last session at the beginning of
this session will be out of context and the client is unlikely to be able to
relate to it.
• One of the many reasons that coaches refrain from self disclosure is
anxiety about it being ‘my stuff ’ and, therefore, not relevant to the
client. So how do you know if your emotional reaction is a genuine
response to a client or ‘your own stuff ’ (technically known as
countertransference? Sometimes it is obvious, as when a client reminds
you of someone else, or brings material which evokes a strong reaction
that reactivates a past event or relationship of your own, or touches on
a strong value that you hold. Here it is probably more appropriate to
refrain from disclosing, reflect further and take your reaction to
supervision. One question to ask yourself is how frequently something
happens. For example, are you working on the same issue with every
coaching client that you have? If you are, then it is highly possible that
you are (unconsciously) shaping the agenda because it’s your interest
(or your expertise).
This is why supervision is so essential.
3. How to disclose
• When noticing your internal world, make sure you articulate it first to
yourself and then to the client using language which is both nonjudgemental and non-interpretive, and which is phrased in the present
‘here and now’, e.g. “that’s interesting, I notice that my attention is
drifting” as opposed to “this is (she is) really boring!”.
538