How to Coach Yourself and Others Popular Models for Coaching | Page 187

Techniques
There is an almost total absence of techniques in Rogerian
model due to the unique character of each counselling
relationship. Of utmost importance, however, is the quality of
the relationship between coachee and coach or therapist. "The
therapeutic relationship...is the critical variable, not what the
coach or therapist says or does."
If there are any techniques they are listening, accepting,
understanding and sharing, which seem more attitudeorientated than skills-orientated. In Corey's (1991) view "a
preoccupation with using techniques is seen [from the Rogerian
standpoint] as depersonalising the relationship." The Rogerian
coachee-centred approach puts emphasis on the person coming
to form an appropriate understanding of their world and
themselves.

Incongruity
Rogers identified the "real self” as the aspect of one's being that
is founded in the actualizing tendency, follows organismic
valuing, needs and receives positive regard and self-regard. It is
the "you" that, if all goes well, you will become. On the other
hand, to the extent that our society is out of sync with the
actualizing tendency, and we are forced to live with conditions
of worth that are out of step with organismic valuing, and
receive only conditional positive regard and self-regard, we
develop instead an "ideal self". By ideal, Rogers is suggesting
something not real, something that is always out of our reach,
the standard we cannot meet. This gap between the real self and
the ideal self, the "I am" and the "I should" is called incongruity.

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