How to Coach Yourself and Others Influencing, Inter Personal and Leadership Skills | Page 70

Tips for Encouraging Authentic Feedback
 Before you ask for feedback, be clear in your own mind why you’re asking.
 Ask for feedback only when you are open to hearing it.
 Listen to what they have to say. Take notes.
 Avoid being defensive. Don’t try to explain yourself during the feedback process.
 Restate what the speaker has told you, to make sure that you understand what
they’ve said.
 Ask follow-up questions to gain clarity; get specifics. For example:
 “Can you give me some specifics?”
 “What impact is that having?”
 “Can you tell me more about that?”
 Thank them.
 When possible, make changes as a result of the feedback.
 Initially, ask infrequently until others see that you’re willing to make changes
based on earlier feedback given you. Remember that you need to build trust in the fact
that you really want to hear what they have to say and that you will do something to
change.
Remember, those acting out of the Leader paradigm are leaders of change. The best
way you can model to others that change is welcome is to grow and change yourself.
Soliciting feedback is one of the best ways to show symbolically the people you lead that
you are open to input and willing to change. Then, take action on the feedback that you
feel is valid.
You are not required to adopt every bit of feedback that people give you. But try
thinking about feedback as similar to the gifts you receive for your birthday. To
some of them, you’ll say, “YES! GREAT!” To others, you’ll say, “Thank you,” and put
them in your closet. Nevertheless, you will benefit more if you stay open to all of the
feedback, consider it carefully and with an open mind, and incorporate what seems valid.
How to give feedback?
EEC model
Example – what behaviour you have observed
Effect – on the team, manager, customer/client, or company
Change – what change in behaviour do you expect – tell them, or ask them
Example:

George, this spreadsheet you supplied me for the meeting had 3
mistakes.

Effect:

We had to waste time manually calculating the figures.

Change:

How can we improve things for next time?