How to Coach Yourself and Others Influencing, Inter Personal and Leadership Skills | Page 106

3) Social Awareness
The third component of Goleman’s EQ model, Social Awareness, is mostly about
empathy. It’s the ability to read another person’s facial expressions, voice and nonverbal signals in order to understand that person’s emotions. This is especially important
for leaders because by staying attuned to how people are feeling, they can say and do
what is most appropriate.
For example, they can try to calm people’s fears, lessen anger, or in a more positive
example have a good time at the office party.
4) Relationship Management
Relationship Management is where these three skills all come together. This is the most
visible aspect of a person, and in particular leaders. This is where you see skills like
conflict management, team building, and influencing others.
Leaders with good skills in the first three areas of EQ will usually be effective at
managing relationships because they’re attuned to their own emotions and this means
that they’ll approach relationships from a position of authenticity.
It’s not just being friendly, but it’s what Goleman calls “friendliness with a purpose”:
motivating people in the direction you desire. These people are very good at developing
networks, not necessarily because they’re highly sociable, but rather because they
understand that nothing gets done alone and they’re skilled at being able to work with
others.
These EQ skills are unique from a person’s technical skills and cognitive abilities.
According to Goleman’s research: 90% of the difference between star performers and
average performers was attributable to EQ competencies. This and other research show
that EQ skills are directly linked to critical business measures and individual success,
more so than traditional measures such as IQ. It’s not that IQ and traditional factors are
not important. Clearly they are.
But IQ and various job-specific skills are essentially entry requirements, particularly in
leadership and managerial positions.
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