How to Coach Yourself and Others How to Influence, Persuade and Motivate | Page 24

22. Ask and validate
You can help improve the persuasiveness of your
conversation abilities by employing two tactics. First, ask
others about their own goals, beliefs, and desires. Try to
understand where they are coming from. Later, repeat this
point of view and validate it. This will make others much
more likely to listen to what you have to say, build trust,
and can be incredibly persuasive.
23. Use “but” wisely
In any statement using “but,” listeners tend to focus more
on what follows the key word instead of what precedes it.
That’s why it’s important to make the final part of any
“but” sentence the positive part, as that’s what listeners
will remember.
24. Get commitments to be public, active, and voluntary
The most effective way to get people to follow through on
what they’ve agreed to do after you’ve gone through all
that persuading? Make sure the commitment employs
these three elements. If nothing else, get commitment in
writing, as one study found participants nearly three times
as likely to show up when they were required to fill out a
form rather than just orally commit.
25. Employ authority
People are much more likely to go along with the advice
of an expert or an authority than the average layman.
Studies have shown that people are much more likely to
do something, even if they’re uncomfortable with it, if
they’re being encouraged to do so by an authority figure
or an expert.

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