Hong Kong Young Writers Anthologies Fiction Group 3 - 2017 | Page 9

thought. At the first mention of even leaving the city her parents had shut down the idea and shattered her short
lived dreams. After that, she lived knowing that she could become anything in the world and go anywhere she
pleased but that she never would. The thought ate her alive. Making it through life only seemed possible with the
stories and hopes that Miss Pai flooded her with, but even that didn't last for long, the young teacher had decided
that this life was too plain for her and went on to continue her tour of the world. Slowly but steadily, Mei
collapsed.
Nothing interested her anymore, how could it when she knew that there were such great things that she would
never achieve. Thoughts raced through her head every day, and they drove her insane, as usual, no one around her
noticed. Blissful obliviousness remained in their minds, Miss Pai had been a crazy and exciting experience for them
but it was nothing memorable, and any thought of her faded from their minds after a while, they just didn't care at
all, they didn't want to see what she had seen, do the things she had done, perfectly content with only hearing
about the great wonders that could be achieved. But Mei just couldn't live with it, she either had to live any
amazing life or no life at all. Which is how it came to be that she was walking through the street towards the park,
bright pink socks on her feet and a loaded gun in her purse.
She had considered how she would do it several times, jumping off a building or swallowing a handful of pills just
didn't seem certain enough, she could always be saved and that was not an option. She was going to go out with a
bang, quite literally. The world around her blurred as she caught sight of the park, everything had to be shut out,
no turning back. A blanket of fallen leaves covered the ground that she walked on, crackling with each step taken
closer to the fountain, the fountain with the icy blue water that would soon be tinted red with her blood. Blood
had always made her nauseous, sometimes she really wondered how she survived it every month , but now she
would be gone before she had to see it, a sheet of welcoming darkness would be draped over her mind. Joyful cries
vibrated in the air around her, children running and jumping into piles of leaves, watching in wonder as they flew
up only to come back down to earth. That was what she had done. She had flown up into her hopes and dreams,
imagined an amazing life for herself, become a helium balloon that would only ever go up. But of course, leaves fall
back to the ground, balloons deflate and dreams get crushed. It was time.
Pulling open the zipper of her purse seemed like the hardest thing at that moment. Her fingers curled around the
cold handle of the gun and she lightly pulled at the trigger, being careful not to pull too far back. The gun felt
heavy in her hand as she pulled it out of the purse and brought it up to her torso, she had to do this now, now or
never. People were beginning to look over at her and the children had stopped running around the park. Time
seemed to slow as she brought the gun up to her temple and rested her finger on the trigger. Everything around her
was blurring, all her senses were lost, did someone scream? Was that a person coming towards her? Blinking once
was all it took to bring her focus back to reality and a bright smile melted onto her shaking lips. She pulled the
trigger.