hiya bucks Amersham, Beaconsfield, Chesham, Gerrards Cross, Missenden January 2016 | Page 20

Confessions of a Cat Sitter Chris Pascoe is the author of A Cat Called Birmingham & You Can Take the Cat Out of Slough, and a columnist for various UK & international magazines. He’s also a cat sitter… Cat Comforts Cat Sitting Services Flexible, friendly & professional service We visit your cats in their home while you’re away. Fully insured and recommended. Tel: 01494 639486 Mobile: 07782 632814 Email: [email protected] www.catcomforts.ukpet.com 20 His difficulties began the moment we had one installed, and over the months his attempts to employ it as a legitimate door progressed from an early 100% failure rate through many varied experimental (mainly doomed) approach angles, to total disaster. At one time, he even star ted climbing through backwards, which presented the disturbing spectacle of a tabby rear-end suddenly appearing from nowhere, wiggling at you for ten minutes, then just as suddenly disappearing. He eventually developed a technique that can only have been born of frustration. In total contrast to his normal ner vy one-paw-at-a-time bunchup, he suddenly began launching himself headfirst at the flap. This only almost worked. Speaking in an aerodynamic sense, something was always horribly wrong with Brum. He somehow managed to consistently execute magnificent back-flips on the way through – he’d hit the catflap with all four paws pointing downwards but by the time he was through, they’d all by pointing to the sky. It was one of the most incredible feats of high-speed twisting gymnastics I’ve ever witnessed. But his ver y worst moment came when there was no catflap at all. We’d had new doors installed you see, and hadn’t yet managed to re-install Brum’s catflap. This didn’t deter our Brum at all – though how he failed to notice there was no longer a hole in the door I’ll never know. Still employing his ‘raging bull’ approach to catflapping, he came charging across the patio and launched himself headfirst into a solid wood door – hitting it so hard that his rear legs shot way up ove