Confessions of a Cat Sitter
Chris Pascoe is the author of A Cat Called Birmingham & You Can Take the Cat
Out of Slough, and a columnist for various UK & international magazines.
He’s also a cat sitter…
Cat Comforts
One of the most common lines I hear when filling out
my checklist on a new client’s preferences and their
cat’s unconditional demands, is the follow sentence:
‘We’re having problems with a big black cat.’
The big black cat they complain of is never their own,
and rarely do they have the faintest idea where the
cat comes from or lives. The next sentence is almost
always identical too – ‘he comes through the catflap
at night, terrorises *insert Suki, Fluffy or Tommy*, and
eats all their food.’ It’s always the same story, whether
it’s one end of my 15 mile catsitting radius or the
other, it’s always a night time raid on the food bowls,
it always scares the hackles off of resident felines…
and it’s always a big black cat.
So, who is he? Who’s this big black cat conducting a
one-man aggravated burglary crime-wave across the
Bucks, Berks and Oxon
area?
Of course, we know it
can’t possibly be one cat
doing all this, don’t we? So,
is it an organised gang of
furry feline felons, a cat
burglar ring, all appearing
suitably attired in black
jumpsuits
and
black
balaclavas?
No, just a poor desperate
bunch of strays I fear. But
really, why do so many of them fit the exact same
description – completely black? Isn’t that just a little
strange?
Unfortunately, if you scrape below the surface a little,
the answer is staring you right in the face (sounding
like Jonathan Creek here – I’ve always wanted to
sound like Jonathan Creek). Black cats have a problem,
you see, in that they are the least adopted cats in
the UK. Through no fault of their own, people just
seem to choose other cats – colourful gingers and
torties, stripy tabbies, cats with a quirky little splodge
on their nose, or cats in cute white ankle socks. A
completely black shadow with a pair of green eyes
just doesn’t compete in too many people’s minds.
Consequently, black cats therefore account for a
30 |
hiyabucks.com
Cat Sitting Services
Flexible, friendly & professional service
We visit your cats in their
home while you’re away.
Fully insured and recommended.
T el: 01494 639486
Mobile: 07782 632814
Email: [email protected]
www.catcomforts.ukpet.com
massively disproportionate number of Britain’s strays.
So, the fact that so many of these night-time raiders
look so similar, isn’t a mystery at all. The old adage
that black cats are unlucky is actually all too true, if
not in the way the superstition suggests.
Regular readers of my column will know, of course,
that a while ago I too had a huge black nighttime
intruder, and that intruder is now curled up to the
side of my keyboard, microchipped and insured, and
known at the local vets as Bodmin Pascoe. Bodmin
is about the nicest, gentlest cat you could ever meet,
but before he became The Cat Who Came in From
the Cold, he was just another ‘problem we’re having
with a big black cat.’
I have a confession to make though (it’s the right
place for it), just before Bodmin jumped onto my
desk, I felt a strange tickle on my leg, thought it was a
fly, and smacked Bodmin straight round the head. So
even now he’s an unlucky black cat. He accepted my
profuse apologies and a bribe of a cooked chicken
slice though, so all’s well.
One last thing. I’ve remarked a few times above that
black cats are known as unlucky, but this superstition
seems to depend entirely on where you come from
or your own family traditions, because lots of people
say they’re supposed to be lucky, not the opposite.
One thing’s for certain though if you’re walking
down a dark road,
late at night, the wind
howling through the
trees, and a black
cat appears from
the bushes and
walks straight across
your path….chances
are
he’s
going
somewhere.