2H ARRANGING MARRIAGE PRELIMINARIES
months of March, April, May, and June, and especially the
two last l.
However, it is possible in a case of urgency for a marriage
to take place in November or February. But in both these months there are so many precautions to be observed, so many calculations to be made according to the signs of
the Zodiac, the phase of the moon, and other ridiculous follies, that it is far from easy to find a day on which all the auspices are propitious.
There are four different ways of arranging the preliminaries of a marriage. The first, the most honoured and respected of all, is for the father of the bride not only to refuse to receive the sum of money to which he is entitled from the young man ' s parents, but to undertake to bear all the expenses of the ceremony, to purchase all the jewels and other ornaments which it is customary to give a girl on this occasion, and also to make handsome presents to
the son-in-law and his parents. But this can only be done by the rich and people of high position.
The second way is for the parents of both the contracting parties to agree to share all the expenses. The third
method is that usually adopted by people of all castes who are not rich. The parents of the girl insist not only on the youth ' s parents bearing all the expenses of the wedding and of the jewels, but they also exact payment of a sum
of money in return for their daughter, the amount of which is laiddownby caste custom. This method is thecommonest
of all; for to marry and to buy a wife are synonymous expressions in India. Most parents make a regular traffic of their daughters. The wife is never given up to her husband until he has paid the whole of the sum agreed upon 2. This custom is an endless source of quarrels and
1
It is probable that the original reason why the Hindus selected these four months as the most auspicious for marriages, is that during these
months all agricultural work is either finished or suspended on account of the great heat, and also because thecrops, which have just been gathered in, help to defray the expenses of the wedding. Dubois.
2
It was the custom also among the Jews for the husband to give the wife her dower. Genesis xxxiv. 8, 9, & c, xxxi. 15; 1 Samuel xviii. 2o;
liusea iii. 2. Dubois.
This is not true in the majority of instances, though there may be extreme cases of the kind. The following words were uttered recently