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APPENDIX INNLEDNING
Exercise 10 : Noticing and reducing anger using “ the window of tolerance ”
The anger and frustration of survivors is often caused by real and inescapable problems . Not all anger is misplaced ; often it is a healthy , natural response to difficulties . In many instances , the most helpful thing to do is not to focus on finding a solution to these , but on how to manage the problem .
Here , the “ window of tolerance ” can be useful ( see section 3.3.1 ). All people have an area or window where they are in balance , where their state of mind allows them to be present , concentrate , and learn new things . If the person is above the window of tolerance , we say he is overactivated . This means that he cannot cope .
What helps a person to control his anger and return within the window varies from one individual to another . If a survivor tends to become angry , work with him on visualising the “ window of tolerance ”. Plan with him what he can do to get back into the window .
For example , he can :
• Remove himself from the situation and go for a walk or a run , to change his mental and physical state .
• Slowly count backwards from 10 and focus on his breathing .
• Do a grounding exercise ( for example exercise 4 , Progressive muscle relaxation ).
• Have a squeeze ball ready to channel his negative energy .
Exercise 11 : Worry time
When a survivor has spoken about frightening experiences , he may feel worried and anxious afterwards . To a survivor in this position , you can give the following advice :
It is not always possible to forget all worries , but you can schedule a worry-time - for instance between 5.45 and 6 pm . Whenever a worrying thought arrives , notice it and say to it : “ Hello , I know you are there , I will attend to you , but you have to wait until 5.45 ”. Alternatively , seat each of the worrying thoughts and feelings you have around a table . In turn , invite each one to express its concern . When you have listened to what they have to say , you review what they have said . You decide what you can dismiss and what might be useful . Then you end the meeting and go on with your day .