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The story shows that :
• Maria was abused by a relative and was not believed when she told the story to her family .
• She reacts with shame , confusion , anxiety and anger .
• She is ambivalent about sharing her story with a teacher .
• It is important to reach out to the mother and educate her about her child ’ s needs .
Maria from Brazil
Maria lived with her mother , who worked all day to support them because Maria ’ s father left the family when Maria was two . Maria went to a public school . In Brazil , many public schools still do not run full-time classes . Many children attend school for half a day ( morning or afternoon ). Maria attended the morning session . In the afternoon , her grandma took care of her until her mother picked her up after work .
One day , Maria took a nap while her grandma was running an errand . A few minutes later , her uncle came into the room and laid down in bed with her . He told Maria he was only going to cuddle her . Then , he started to pull her close and run his hands over her body . Maria started to feel confused and nervous because the way her uncle was touching her felt different from the way any adult had ever touched her before . She felt very uncomfortable and ashamed , but she could not understand exactly why .
Maria ’ s uncle assured her that everything was fine and that his behaviour was normal . He told her that he regularly did the same thing with her cousins . He also said Maria ’ s mother and grandmother knew about this behaviour , but it would be best not to mention it . Maria kept feeling more and more anxious and confused . Despite her uncle ’ s comments , she did not feel his behaviour was normal . She continued to feel ashamed , that they were doing something wrong .
To escape the situation , Maria decided to tell her uncle she needed to go to the bathroom . Once inside , she locked herself in until her grandma came back . When Maria got home that evening , she decided to tell her mother what had happened . Unfortunately , Maria ’ s mother got very upset and told her she was imagining things . She said the uncle was just being nice to her and told Maria to forget about it and never say those things again . Maria felt a lot of guilt , confusion and anger , and as if she was carrying a great weight .
Maria had no alternative but to go to her grandma ’ s house after school . She would avoid taking naps even when she felt tired . She asked her Grandma to take her everywhere with her because she didn ’ t want to be alone with her uncle . She felt guilty for avoiding him and was always scared that her Grandma and mother would notice something . Despite her efforts , she still ended up alone with him sometimes . He would always try to cuddle , ask her to sit on his lap , and do other things that made Maria feel uncomfortable . He kept telling her that what he was doing was natural but that she shouldn ’ t say anything about it .
Avoiding her uncle and hiding what was happening became mentally and emotionally consuming for Maria . She changed from being an outgoing girl to a more timid and angrier child . She would avoid hugs and become irritated if someone tried to get too close or show physical affection . She needed to feel she was in control of her body . To be touched made her remember the feeling she had when she was with